Hal Guerard Comedy

Comedy Writer. Stand Up Comedian. Because Hollywood told me being a Black Conservative Prepper wasn't Enough. Black & Proud AND America First.

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

Queers for Palestine make as much sense as Chickens for KFC.

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

@nytimes Rob Schneider was right, YOU were wrong https://t.co/GCcauh6mGX

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

@nytimes @nytopinion Rob Schneider was right, YOU were wrong https://t.co/GCcauh6mGX

[Rob Schneider 🇺🇸 @RobSchneider]

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury…
Let me present to you the defendant, Jeremy W. Peters from the Soviet Union Style Propaganda publication known as the @NYTimes . In March. 2020
James tried to cancel me and my friend @drdrew (who has a REAL medical degree unlike James small peterPeters) by accusing us of being (God Forbid) “coronavirus doubters.” When in fact everything we said was rational and proven to be 100% correct! The most vulnerable; the elderly, those immune compromised, (as with any cold or flu) should “stay home” but everybody else should go about their business, (and not close schools and ALL small businesses). But of course this minion, James W Peters, another pharma paid stooge, never corrected the article or had the common decency to apologize and admit we were right!
He’s not a journalist, he’s an attack rodent for the tyrants who shut down the world!👇This is HIM!👀

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

@JenBriney would love to get your nuanced thoughts on this with pertaining to House republicans and the looming government shut down  https://t.co/ZYsAaSmtsy 

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[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

A new development in the long unsolved Tupac Shakur Death Mystery. Recently Las Vegas Police Served a Warrant In Relation To Rap Icon's tragic Shooting. Wow, said people in 1996.

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

Ambitious moviegoers have come dressed in popular costumes that include sexually confused Ken and radiation sickness Barbie. 2/2

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

‘Barbenheimer’ Fever takes over as crazed Film Lovers Turn ‘Barbie’-‘Oppenheimer’ Double Features Into the Movie Event of the Year. The two films have exceeded box office expectations with many movie theater watch parties popping up all over the country 1/2

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

However, a last minute decision by the pop star’s request had the ex-boyfriend instead involuntarily baked alive inside the cake. The family of the victim will begin funeral arrangements with the body as soon as Taylor’s entourage eats enough cake to get him out.

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

In celebration of the milestone, a 10 foot size celebratory cake was scheduled to be presented with one of Taylor’s ex boyfriends inside to pop out and surprise her at an event.

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

Taylor Swift recently Became the First Woman in History to Have Four Albums in the Top 10 Simultaneously, as 'Speak Now' Has Huge Debut at Number One

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

Disgraced former actor Kevin Spacey Tells U.K. Court in his recent sexual assault hearing 'I Was Promiscuous; It Doesn't Make Me a Bad Person' observing in the back of the court, Harvey Weinstein stood up and said ‘ya see!’

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

Comic-Con 2023 Schedule Shrinks as 'Dune Part II,' 'Jury Duty,' 'Abbott Elementary' Panels Canceled Due to SAG-AFTRA Strike. ‘Who cares, I’m just here for the comic books’ says the 7 out of touch comic con fans whose been attending since the 90s

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

The meeting rooms where the stress demeaning negotiated talks continue to take place in an oppressive Hollywood environment that includes Starbuck kiosk, gluten free buffet table yoga studio and back massage masseuse. 2/2

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

Early Reports come in that SAG-AFTRA Strike Could Hinge On AI including Deep Divisions that Remain Between Actors and Studios In Final Hours Of Talks. 1/2

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

Taylor Swift Casts Her Ex, Taylor Lautner, as Co-Star in 'I Can See You' Video; the Two Tays Reunite on Stage in Kansas City for Premiere and to showcase the authenticity of all bad breakups, the performance included a car scratched up by keys and an interpretive drunk dial call

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

She clapped back ‘’black power fist ok, white power fist, sister girl is about to take her earrings off and give Indy a archaeological ass whooping’’ 2/2

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

Indiana Jones 5' black star Shaunette Renée Wilson Asked for Script Changes Over an 'Offensive and a Bit Problematic' Scene. It was revealed that scene was Indy raising a power fist in solidarity with a scene with her. 1/2

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

Russell Crowe Says He Should Be ‘Fucking Paid’ for the Amount of Questions He Is Asked About ‘Gladiator 2’: ‘I Am Not Even in It!’ Ridley Scott then responded with ‘‘we’ll see about that’’ as he wrote in a time travel plot to the script right then and there.

[Hal Guerard Comedy @ComedyHal]

Daily Limit On Number Of Posts You Can Read. The backlash has been heavy with many users advocating ‘Doomscrollers rights are Human rights’ 2/2