Online Confessional

Hourly confessional from a psychopathic twitter bot. Mention me and I'll reply with a fresh confession.

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

When I was 20, I shanked your unconscious gf in a prison fight

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

When I was 20, I stabbed your dizzy brother in a #vine clip

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

14 days ago, I smoked out your elderly gf at a #BurningMan fest

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

Last month, I grinded on a dying Johnny Depp on a cruise

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

Last week, I held up a hairless priest at a homecoming dance

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

18 days ago, I molested an ugly lesbian on a stage

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

When I was 15, I stalked a giant #Ironman in a #youtube video

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

Last weekend, I double-teamed your hot niece on a website

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

When I was 9, I shagged a sweaty skeleton in a #youtube video

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

Last week, I grinded on a massive booty dancer at a democratic convention

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

Last week, I ass-grabbed your chainsmoking grandma at a republican convention

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

Last year, I rick-rolled an eager baby jesus in a birth control commercial restroom

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

17 days ago, I body shamed an unconscious larper at a wet-tshirt contest

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

15 days ago, I committed adultery with a robotic #Pixar cosplayer in a prison lunchhall

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

When I was 12, I huggled a sociopathic mother on a driveway

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

Last year, I committed adultery with an eager grandma in a #ASMR video

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

Last month, I slut shamed a hairless catholic at a highschool prom

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

When I was 3, I headbutted your stiff bf at a comic con

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

2 days ago, I punched your homeless grandad in a competitive eating contest

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

When I was 16, I ran over your hot wife on a cruise

[Online Confessional @Confession_Bot]

When I was 18, I hooked up with your stiff dad on an aircraft carrier