Conti Flapps

Performer. I am the show. Don't leave me flapping in the wind. Let me fly! Let me stick it innuendo. #FreeEntryBefore1am

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

I hugged a tree once... but I freaked when my hand brushed against some man's pet squirrel. #Hippy #SurpriseSquirrel #HappyEarthDay

[weenick @weenick]

This years bad taste party costume. Me - hangover Barbie, @gingicle a horse. As strange as usual!

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

You're getting old when you wake up in the morning & have to floss between your legs #SevenSignsOfAging #OlderNotWiser #Floss #FurryNickers

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

If Oreos are sexy biscuits, like my dear friend proclaimed, then are Jammy Dodgers sexy biscuits on their period? #Oreo #Jammy #Blob

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

One day I shall master sincerity. Until then I will have to make do with your beautiful faces. #SarcasmIsADisease #sarcasm #beautiful

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

My tulips are in bloom. Marvellous! #FuzzyDuck

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

@gingicle @billie_r_martin If she is, as you put it, "coming in your ears" then you're not doing it right. #Amateurs

[Richard Meek @Richardmeek]

Just laughed outloud at my friends little drawing !!! RT @clairegreenway: Happy non-Valentines my lovelies!

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

@Markgatiss I'm pure jelly. Slap me on a serving dish and watch me wobble! #WibbleWobble

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

Prepare for the second coming? I didn't know there was a first. #TimeToChangeTheSheets

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

It's oh so windy today... and the weather's not that great, either! #ArtyFarty #KylieFlower #HopeIDidNotJustPoopMyPants

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

@mapofricard Pop! Bang! Fizzle! Slap! Whomp! Bop-a-Looba! A-wop! Bamboo! Ta DAH!

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

@weenick As a Doctor, I suggest wine. And then some more wine. With a wine chaser. #NotARealDoctor

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

Shoplifters? This early in the morning? It's going to be a long day. #IHateJunkies

[Ana Matronic @MsAnaMatronic]

Thanks for the support on my Newsnight appearance. Keep the women of #PussyRiot in your hearts & (punk) prayers. ✊

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

@siamusic We all do. #Profound #HangingwLesbians

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

#Gay "cure" sessions are coming to a church near you - and they're making millions! Take action & shut them down: http://t.co/Q8erS2IZ

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

#ThatMomentWhen it's time to go home after a #BadTasteParty & you don't have a change of clothes. #Kiki

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

Cleaning up devastation left in wake of #BadTasteParty . Still in my heels. #Kiki aftermath

[Conti Flapps @ContiFlapps]

Celebrated poor dress sense last night at Mel & Stan's Annual #BadTasteParty #Kiki