Matthias Lubner

On the outlook for new challenges / IT Guy / Love my iMac, Mac Book & iPhone 3G / I'm dying for good wine & cigars

[Matthias Lubner @Copymaster]

Die Generation YouTube entdeckt die ökonomische Realität: https://t.co/QOCq1eGVnp #achtunglinks #KarlLässtSchönGrüssen 👌💪🥰 #dasichdasnocherlebendarf 🥲

[Charlotte Clymer 🇺🇦 @cmclymer]

Tonight marks the first time Trump has sat in front of a court while not facing charges.

[𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 @OrevaZSN]

I want my children and their children to inherit national parks and polar bears, not data centres and dry riverbeds.

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

Give us actual fucking evidence that elections are rigged or shut the fuck up about it.

[Tobias Lange  @lange_tobias_hh]

Habe eine Landkarte von Europa 2028 gefunden. #SlavaUkraïni

[Tobias Lange  @lange_tobias_hh]

90% der Wahlberechtigten sind Normalverdiener mit einem einfachen Leben. Die #CDU möchte von diesen Menschen gewählt werden, hasst sie aber gleichzeitig und zeigt Ihnen das auch. Finde den Fehler...

[meghan @deloisivete]

*fills out form*

*clicks "send me a copy"*

email: *dings*

me: ooh what's that

[LaughBreak: Dad Jokes ‘N More @MediocreJoker85]

An elderly woman walked into a bank, handed her card to the teller, and said politely, “I’d like to withdraw $10.”

The teller barely looked up and replied, “For withdrawals under $100, you’ll need to use the ATM.”

The old lady calmly asked, “Why is that?”

Clearly annoyed, the teller handed the card back and snapped, “Those are the rules, ma’am. Please step aside if there’s nothing else. There’s a line of customers waiting.”

The old lady stood quietly for a moment, then handed the card back again and said, “In that case, I’d like to withdraw all the money in my account.”

The teller smirked… until she checked the balance.

Her attitude changed immediately.

Lowering her voice, she said,

“Ma’am… you have $300,000 in your account. Unfortunately, we don’t keep that much cash on hand. We can arrange an appointment for tomorrow.”

The old lady nodded and asked, “How much can I withdraw right now?”

“Up to $3,000,” the teller replied warmly.

“Perfect,” the old lady said. “I’ll take it.”

Moments later, the teller returned with the cash, smiling and treating her like royalty.

The old lady carefully placed $10 into her purse… then handed the remaining $2,990 back across the counter.

“I’d like to deposit this back into my account, please.”

[SILVER @Read_Meee]

Fucking NHS. I woke up this morning with some trouble in my eye. Called the optician. Had tests. Sent straight to hospital with a torn retina.

They insisted on giving me laser surgery there and then to fix it. Didn't want any money for the job. Now I'm home again.

How inconsiderate. Joking aside. Remember there are people out there who want to dismantle the NHS.

[Vanish Into You @stopitvish]

If your love has conditions, don't have kids.

[MissTrelawny (sic!) @fingurplaustert]

Was ich manchmal denke über Liebe und so?

Es ist nicht großartig, wenn du heute aus vollem Herzen sagen kannst 'Ich liebe dich'.

Es ist großartig, wenn du es in 20 Jahren noch sagen kannst.
Aus vollem Herzen.

[Anonymous @YourAnonNews]

This fucking guy isn't even a good liar

[Vatnik Soup @P_Kallioniemi]

I've never heard this level of cautious optimism from my friends in the Ukrainian military before.

Russia is definitely losing.

[Tobias Lange  @lange_tobias_hh]

"Jeder sollte irgendwie genug zum Leben haben" ist heutzutage eine linksextremistische Position.

[French Response @FrenchResponse]

Which country crossed whose borders?

[WarMonitor🇺🇦🇬🇧 @WarMonitor3]

Ukrainian soldiers on the frontline have better access to the internet than Russian citizens sitting in Moscow that tells you all you need to know-Zelenskyy

[skypro @skypromusic]

#Timmy wurde durch Gott selbst geschickt, um die westliche Welt mit Biodiesel zu versorgen, während die Straße von Hormus blockiert wird …

Erkennt das doch endlich!!!!1111
🐳🏎️

[Anonymous @YourAnonNews]

No war but the class war