LETS GO @mamonksnk my main homie, get well not soon but NOW! A new day starts today! Chat GPT give me motivational quote: “Don't let the loudest voices online become the most important voices in your life.”
Anyways Imma go shopping for canes, I cant walk
Ok, so this message is from Mamon.
She reached out to me the other day to post this message out as a sort of update.
They helped the interview acc heavily in the early days so I just consider this a favor and it's a long one:
Hello, everyone. I am MAMON.
I have asked my friend Hunter to post this on my behalf on his account because I want to give a bit of an update while I'm still away from Twitter and Discord. My only sources of contact at the moment are my number and IG (the latter being used mainly to reach out to my online friends who don't feel comfortable sharing phone numbers).
I know this isn't me getting fully off the Internet, as being chronically online is an old habit of mine that will surely die hard, but I am slowly working on myself my own way as the therapy institute I'm under only has limited appointment duration which patients are in no position to negotiate with. Psychologists get 30 minutes per patient and psychiatrists 15 - both of whom I have.
Now with better understanding, I want to readdress something in a proper way:
Three months have passed since I made my response doc. Looking back, I see why it didn't land for some. Even if I wrote it sincerely and intended for what I wrote to solely be an explanation for why I acted that way, some found my wording as me using excuses and scapegoats. The past me would say "I'm sorry" and prioritize to whoever I offended that my intentions were harmless, but now I'm starting to relearn that for others, impact matters more than intent, which was the opposite of what my birth father has taught me. And for that alone, I want to say that I'm sorry to those I have disappointed with my response doc regardless.
Ever since thefirst doc on me, 1 am unlearning more unhealthy behaviors from my childhood, and also working on myself. Since then I no longer lash out at myself nor mass-vent to others nor hold an intense fear of being disliked. I now see why it came off as me seeing my friends as free therapists despite never viewing them that way.
Additionally, there is a set of screenshots in the rebuttal doc that depicts me threatening that l'Il return to my groomer.
To me back then, I only saw yelling out urges related to my trauma solely as a coping mechanism just to get it out of my system, unaware that others seen it as a threat. I have apologized to that person privately two months ago, but with the realization I have recently l'Il say sorry to them again for the severity of my actions during my breakdown and for how I hurt them through my outburst and dismissing them. I still struggle with the what-if urge to return to my groomer due to my intense fear of being alone, but throughout these past three months I realized that I made a better choice by listening to myself for once.
In my view, being ignorant of advice from my friends current and former, as well as having intense breakdowns almost on the daily, were because I subconsciously gaslit myself to never listen to the side of me that wants to detach for a bit and check myself.
After deciding to stop that unhealthy habit, I shifted to journaling, composing, and other healthy coping mechanisms more frequently to stop abusing myself and stop my outbursts getting out of control in front of others throughout these past three months, and I will continue doing those things until (and after) I find a better therapy institute to accommodate me due to the aforementioned circumstances in the first page.
So even if my words come off as childish due to my mentality, I want to reiterate that I'll forever be sorry to those in the doc that I've hurt around me. Even without harmless intent, you were hurt and affected by my uncontrolled emotional venting outbursts and reckless choices regardless, which was the effect to the cause. None of you deserve this the way I don't deserve this trauma I've held from my past for too long. Thank you for making the doc to see the error of my ways, and for also putting it out as a wake-up call
After the last post I made about Xan Kriegor, multiple ppl have reached out to me publicly/privately and asked for me to post this doc about "Xan_Kriegor8615" from discord.
Do not harass anyone mentioned in this doc, also I'm just the messenger, this isn't my doc.
Normally I wouldn't be posting about these sorts of things, however the amount of ppl who have dealt with this guy are numerous and documented.
Doc Link: https://t.co/OQXfgUFwQj
@Funkininterview since holmes won't say it, I'll say it because I do not have a reputation to uphold. I have reasons to believe that this muckraker is a groomer and is deflecting onto innocent people