Cricket Chairman

Questionable cricketing advice from #Cricket Chairman.

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

@mikebirty Thank you for your response.

Could you please go ahead and choose the “I don’t have a wife/gf” option?

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

Many club cricketers will tell their wife/girlfriend that winter nets start in November in order to gain a weekly visit to the pub with their friends.

Where do you stand on this?

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

To celebrate Alex Hales’ incredible match-winning innings, we will be supplying FREE COKE on Sunday as we show the match live in the clubhouse.

Doors will be open from 7am.

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

Should umpires be allowed to swear?

- "Howzat?"
- "Fuck off."

I think it may be inappropriate (particularly in junior cricket).

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

@aan4nd Unfortunately we experienced this on two separate occasions this year. Both incidents were reported to the league’s umpiring association/panel.

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

Club WhatsApp groups will often go quiet through the winter.

Generate conversation by reminding your teammates of memorable moments from the summer.

- A great catch
- A bad drop
- An embarrassing moment
- Someone sleeping with the barmaid/scorer/umpire

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

Are you missing cricket?

Recreate a cricketing environment this winter by calling your wife a c**t and then buying her a pint at 7pm.

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

I stand against online bullying.

All bullying should take place on the pitch and in certain scenarios in the clubhouse.

Please AVOID tweeting opposition players/umpires/scorers/tea-ladies with hate/sledging/revenge-porn.

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

Tell me it’s the start of the British Cricket Season without telling me it’s the start of the British Cricket Season …

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

When the fat keeper calls you a cunt all afternoon, but says “well played” during hand shakes.

[Dana Goldberg @DGComedy]

This was so weird. #RNC2020

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

I’m going to take my lid off for the slower stuff.

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

What’s something that you can say during sex and cricket? #cricketfamily

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

Highlights will be online by 9pm.

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

Who arranges a test match in Southampton in August?

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

Avoid being caught on camera with a 90-year-old woman in order to:

- Keep your place in the test team
- Save your marriage
- Not feature in this week’s #simplylovely whatsapp video

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

Social experiment.

Tag your most useless club cricketer and see if they reply... 👇

[Cricket Shouts 🏏 @crickshouts]

Social experiment.

Tag your favourite cricketer and see if they reply... 👇

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

For four weekends only you will be able to call the batsman a c**t and not have to face them in the bar afterwards. Embrace it. #getthegameon

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

Get your ridiculous cricketing merch here: https://t.co/RH7fsmO9Hd

[Cricket Chairman @CricketChairman]

If you’re not excited by today’s prospect of having to sit in your car alone watching the rain fall, fully whited-up, tucking into your £3 meal deal tea and listening to the Test Match Special re-run of the 1st Day’s play at 2 runs/over then do you even love cricket?