David Young

Living with a bear, a tiger and a jackass.🦞

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@ChudTheBuilder We need a Chud official endorsement for the best pepper spray on the market!

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@adamcarolla @spencerpratt Did you get a permit to fly that drone, to walk around with a camera in a construction site?

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@Tesla is work being done currently to provide real-time networking for Tesla vehicles? There are so many FSD advantages that could be developed that would take advantage of this capability.

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@realDailyWire @michaeljknowles Methinks Micheal’s fans are having some fun at his expense.

It’s glorious to see.

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@TheWapplehouse There is no greater confirmation of a man’s positive influence when rumors of his passing are celebrated by the worst of our kind.

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@FurkanGozukara @grok how much would 80,000 drones cost at $50,000 each and what percent of Iran’s GDP would that be?

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@TB1Kinobe Ummm…that’s gotta plug into another beam. Need to show the other half!

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@sentdefender How hard would it be for an AI platform to know exactly who created this video?

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

Accurate

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

Last September I announced mandatory return-to-office.

Five days a week.

I called it a "culture-first initiative."

Culture means presence.

Presence means badge swipes.

Badge swipes mean metrics.

Metrics mean I can prove something to the board.

I don't know what.

But I can prove it.

The announcement went out on a Tuesday.

I sent it from my home office.

In Aspen.

I have an exemption.

"Strategic leaders require location flexibility to maintain global perspective."

I wrote that policy.

HR approved it.

HR approves everything I write.

By Wednesday, 340 employees had updated their LinkedIn status to "Open to Work."

I called it "natural attrition."

Natural attrition means they quit before I had to pay severance.

Very natural.

We lost 47 engineers in the first month.

I told the board it was "alignment correction."

The people who left weren't aligned.

With coming to an office.

That I also don't come to.

But that's different.

I'm strategic.

The office costs $4.2 million per year.

Empty, it was a write-off.

Now it's a "collaboration hub."

I measured collaboration.

Average daily Zoom calls from the office: 7.4 per employee.

They commute 45 minutes.

To take calls they could take from home.

But now they're "present."

Presence is culture.

I've never been more certain of anything.

A senior engineer asked why we couldn't stay remote.

She had metrics.

Productivity was up 23% during remote work.

I said, "Productivity isn't everything."

She asked what else mattered.

I said, "Serendipitous collisions."

She asked how we measure serendipitous collisions.

I said, "You can't. That's what makes them serendipitous."

She stopped asking questions.

Then she stopped showing up.

Then LinkedIn said she's at a company that's "remote-first."

Good luck with that.

They'll learn.

We installed badge tracking software.

It cost $380,000.

It tells me exactly when people arrive.

And when they leave.

And how long they spend in each zone.

I check it every morning.

From home.

The data is fascinating.

Average arrival time: 9:47 AM.

Average departure time: 4:12 PM.

I sent a Slack message.

"Core hours are 9 to 6."

Arrival times shifted to 9:02 AM.

Departure times shifted to 6:01 PM.

Productivity did not change.

But the metrics look better.

Metrics are culture.

We have a "hybrid" option now.

Three days in office.

Mandatory Monday. Mandatory Wednesday. Mandatory Friday.

That's called "hybrid."

Because Tuesday and Thursday are optional.

But there are "anchor meetings" on Tuesday and Thursday.

Attendance is "strongly encouraged."

"Strongly encouraged" means mandatory without the liability.

I learned that from legal.

The head of product asked if he could work from home when his wife had surgery.

I said, "Of course. Family comes first."

Then I said, "But let's revisit your Q4 performance targets."

He came to the office.

His wife understood.

I assume.

I didn't ask.

That's personal.

The CFO asked about ROI on the RTO policy.

I showed him the badge data.

"Presence is up 340%."

He asked if revenue was up.

I said, "Revenue is a lagging indicator."

He asked what the leading indicator was.

I said, "Badge swipes."

He nodded.

The lease renews next year.

Seven more years.

$29 million committed.

We needed bodies in the building.

Now we have bodies.

Fewer than before.

But present.

Morale is down.

Glassdoor says we're "hostile to work-life balance."

I told HR to respond.

They wrote, "We're a high-performance culture that values in-person collaboration."

That's corporate for "the review is accurate."

But it sounds like a rebuttal.

The CEO asked if RTO was working.

I said, "Absolutely."

He asked for evidence.

I showed him a photo of the office.

Full desks. Glowing monitors. Bodies in chairs.

He smiled.

"This is what culture looks like."

It looked like a stock photo.

Because I got it from a stock photo website.

The real office has 40% occupancy on a good day.

But he doesn't know that.

He's also remote.

We're both strategic.

Next quarter I'm proposing a "collaboration bonus."

$2,000 for anyone with 95% badge-in compliance.

The bonus costs less than the turnover.

And it shifts the narrative.

We're not forcing people to come in.

We're "incentivizing presence."

Incentivizing means paying people to do something they don't want to do.

It's different from mandating.

Legally.

The employees who stayed are "loyal."

Loyalty means they have mortgages.

And kids in school districts.

And RSUs that haven't vested.

They're not loyal.

They're trapped.

But on paper, it looks like loyalty.

And paper is what the board sees.

I've been doing this for 22 years.

I know what culture looks like.

It looks like butts in seats.

Butts in seats mean control.

Control means management.

Management means me.

RTO isn't about productivity.

It never was.

It's about seeing people.

So I know they exist.

So I know they're working.

So I know I'm in charge.

That's culture.

As long as the badge swipes go up and to the right.

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@anon_opin How many phone companies are still around today vs calculator companies?

There’s your winner!

[david friedberg @friedberg]

why not just raise income tax rates?

because your real intent is not to just “provide healthcare”.

you’re masking that you are proposing the creation of, for the first time in the 250 years of this American republic, an organized government seizure of private property from citizens.

you’re calling it a “wealth tax” or a “billionaires tax” or “millionaires tax” or whatever nom du jour polls well. but at the end of the day, it’s the seizure of private property from citizens by the government. citizens that earned money, paid their fair taxes on those earnings (53% if they live in California) and are now being told they need to hand over after-tax assets because the government has failed to provide promised services with the revenue it’s collected, and are now re-casting their own failure to be a socio-economic inequity that must be justly resolved... a slippery slope that has never gone anywhere good (see economic effects in USSR, Cuba, Venezuela, France and Norway wealth tax etc.)

the American founders fled tyranny in Europe and this amazing nation was populated by immigrants (myself and your parents) from around the world not just looking for a “better life” but for a place where they could have freedom from tyrannical governments that can take what they want from private citizens. a great nation borne of property rights, the rule of law, and endowed freedoms to believe, speak, or act. these principles led to the greatest run of innovations, successes, and widespread increase in prosperity, for all citizens, ever seen.

the citizens, the individuals, not the institutions, delivered this progress. those who invented, who toiled, who bled, who sacrificed, who took risk and persevered, who led, and who changed the world, are not charlatans, kleptocrats, or oligarchs. they’re what made us all better off. prosperity is a measure of america’s success, not its failure.

it is your principle that is so offensive, as evidenced by the broad disdain for your flippant flirtation with the darkest of human fantasy - socialism. you and other neo-socialists have led so many of us to reflect on America’s history and what it is becoming. that now leads so many to consider, so unnecessarily, leaving their homes for a place where everyone stands up to shout down the principle you suggest. because if your ideas are now considered moderate, it’s clear this titanic is sinking.

that a “simple tax” of taking assets that have been earned, through toil and tribulation, rightly taxed, and preserved, should now be unjustly seized, is your solution to a problem of obvious government mismanagement and outright fraud, tells us that your true motivation lies not in giving people healthcare but in cutting down success and deleting the system of prosperity and opportunity for all.

i don’t care, and neither should anyone else, what the sum total market value of a private citizens private assets might be. it is none of my business and should be none of yours. because, again, once you open that pandora’s box, we might as well study Lord of the Flies … there is literally nothing stopping 51% of citizens demanding that their government go out and seize 100% of the private property of the 49%.

want to give healthcare to people in need? do your job and fix healthcare. make it affordable. want to be lazy about it? then do your job lazily and raise income taxes.

want to take private property from private citizens who have paid their fair share of taxes and legally earned their property, then honestly declare that it is envy, not inequity, that you strive to resolve…

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@otokyo Duke

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@tedcruz

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@ChrisCuomo Come on @ChrisCuomo. That’s a weak argument coming from a strong mind.

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@GovPressOffice A comment worthy of your reputation. Total scum.

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

Come on, Matt. Of course it’s AI. For all the reasons you listed. And it’s great. You really think they were trying to convince people these were practical effects? Of course not. The joke is evident to everyone.

Stop busting their balls just for the sake of busting someone’s balls.

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@axios

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@TMZ I heard he got a paper cut from his teleprompter.

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

@MattWalshBlog Please include toilet brushes in this list. So hard to find one that will last more than a year!!!

[David Young @Da_ma_yo]

You have to realize that you are being perceived as either a.) Hollywood elitist that serves no purpose other than seeing just how far you can stick your own head up your own ass or b.) a buffoon whose opinion is meaningless and self-serving or c.) a good person that offers nothing of substance other than to call out what you perceive as an injustice.

I mean, you aren’t stupid. And your heart is in the right place. I get that.

But, in my humble of opinions (the humblest of all opinions I would argue) you are simply disconnected from reality. There are so many valid arguments against these virtuous statements you are making. How may of those would you hear?