Danny Harrison

Not Rotherham United midfielder and general good guy Danny Harrison. I once scored 2 goals against Dagenham & Redbridge you know.

[Not Richie Smallwood @Not_Smallwood33]

Did you miss me? #rufc

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

I'm hearing @Not_Smallwood33 is doing the unseen work at RUFC these days. They're calling him the Harrison of New York. Probably follow him

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

Danny Harrison = League 1 footballer. Jason 'Jaybo' Taylor = League 2 footballer. Thank you and goodnight

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

I told him, 'Roy, I'm sorry, I haven't got his number. Now I have to get off, I've got some captaining to do'

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

plus the mental welfare of all who had to receive therapy for a recurring nightmare of Barry drowning in quicksand as Mesut Ozil saunters by

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

But for the good of England's Euro 2012 campaign, Hodgson's job and the slight chance of me and Craig getting a surprise call-up

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

The funny thing is I actually have got his number. Me, him and Craig Gardner all went to the same school. We were well behaved in class.

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

I pointed out that I hadn't got Gareth Barry's number.

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

He apologised, saying he'd looked up 'slow, ageing midfielder who's somehow made a career out of the game by playing for just two clubs'.

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

Just had a call from Roy Hodgson. Wrong number.

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

Gonna have to give Rhys a game today I think. Rain and temperature is doing nothing for Woggy's arthritis. Poor old jellyfish.

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

Reports from Swindon that a man has been seen transforming into a giant cobra.

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

In other news, I can't comprehend why Conrad Logan wasn't in the L2 team of the year. He brought the best out of every opposition player.

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

Reminded the gaffer of my commitment to the cause & why I should be given a new deal by being the first to jump on Jafar's back on Saturday

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

I hate Jaybo

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

He's the only player in the Football League to have a negative pass completion rate. -12% it is. I don't know how that's even possible

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

You probably think I stick pins in a Jaybo doll's feet before games, but he's that bad without the intervention of Haitian witchcraft.

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

It's right opposite my Jason Taylor voodoo pit.

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

They were all asking me if they could swap shirts with me, bless them. I had to decline, I keep all my shirts in my Harrison shrine at home

[Danny Harrison @DannyHarrison4]

Don't worry, I took it easy on them the poor bastards, I scored two and then just teased them a bit.