Darshancodehunt

Vella

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.

$30 per seat per month.

$1.4 million annually.

I called it "digital transformation."

The board loved that phrase.

They approved it in eleven minutes.

No one asked what it would actually do.

Including me.

I told everyone it would "10x productivity."

That's not a real number.

But it sounds like one.

HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.

I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."

They stopped asking.

Three months later I checked the usage reports.

47 people had opened it.

12 had used it more than once.

One of them was me.

I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.

It took 45 seconds.

Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.

But I called it a "pilot success."

Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.

The CFO asked about ROI.

I showed him a graph.

The graph went up and to the right.

It measured "AI enablement."

I made that metric up.

He nodded approvingly.

We're "AI-enabled" now.

I don't know what that means.

But it's in our investor deck.

A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.

I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."

He asked what that meant.

I said "compliance."

He asked which compliance.

I said "all of them."

He looked skeptical.

I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."

He stopped asking questions.

Microsoft sent a case study team.

They wanted to feature us as a success story.

I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."

I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.

They didn't verify it.

They never do.

Now we're on Microsoft's website.

"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."

The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.

He got 3,000 likes.

He's never used Copilot.

None of the executives have.

We have an exemption.

"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."

I wrote that policy.

The licenses renew next month.

I'm requesting an expansion.

5,000 more seats.

We haven't used the first 4,000.

But this time we'll "drive adoption."

Adoption means mandatory training.

Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.

But completion will be tracked.

Completion is a metric.

Metrics go in dashboards.

Dashboards go in board presentations.

Board presentations get me promoted.

I'll be SVP by Q3.

I still don't know what Copilot does.

But I know what it's for.

It's for showing we're "investing in AI."

Investment means spending.

Spending means commitment.

Commitment means we're serious about the future.

The future is whatever I say it is.

As long as the graph goes up and to the right.

[DealzTrendz @dealztrendz]

#Giveaway Alert 🚨

We’re giving away the OnePlus Nord Buds 2r

Steps to Enter ⬇️

🔄 RETWEET
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We’ll pick 🔟 random followers & each will get a OnePlus Nord Buds 2r

GET SET GO #DealzTrendzGiveaway

[Darshancodehunt @darshanCodehunt]

Please please don’t purchase any @EurekaForbes product their service is pathetic. I am waiting from 3 days for their executive to come and fix my water purifier and this is after paying them 6k for the AMC..please don’t purchase their product and go through this head pain..

[Darshancodehunt @darshanCodehunt]

@The_Sleigher Gaali khake hi nind aati hai bhai tujhe

[Darshancodehunt @darshanCodehunt]

@The_Sleigher I pay more tax then bcci..

[𝗔𝗽𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗼 @apollovwrld]

My favourite Kanye West Instagram Posts.

🧵A Thread:

[Darshancodehunt @darshanCodehunt]

@tasawwur_14 @dealztrendz Chinese manufacturers are laughing in a corner if you really think that it is worth 30k..🤦‍♂️

[Not Jerome Powell @alifarhat79]

My wife: where the heck did you spend $25,000 last night?

Me:

[Crime Reports India @AsianDigest]

Pajeets molesting a transgender stage dancer 🤦🏽🤮🤮🤷‍♂️
https://t.co/QK3V4lI8K3

[Raja Babu @GaurangBhardwa1]

That's why India is not for beginners 😭😭

[Tucker Carlson @TuckerCarlson]

Ep. 73 The Vladimir Putin Interview

[Darshancodehunt @darshanCodehunt]

@Fourteia @piersmorgan New low for your mom..

[AgentSaffron @AgentSaffron]

Learn Spanish, go to South America.

Not everyone can immigrate to USA, Canada, Australia etc.

Invest in 1 extra language - 1 hour a day for 2 years and your life can change.

[Darshancodehunt @darshanCodehunt]

@dudeitsokay Tere wajah se mere bhi gaye timeline pe le aaye🤦‍♂️

[Bhargavi @IamHCB]

Here is an audio excerpt from the All India Radio show "Parichaya," hosted by the late Shri #ShankarNag. We commemorate his memory today.

[AgentSaffron @AgentSaffron]

World cannot humiliate us . We have no shame 🤙🤗

[Danish Sait @DanishSait]

Bengaluru Leopard - Official statement after being found near Kudlu Gate.

[Byomkesh @byomkesbakshy]

Is teacher ka turant pata lagao aur isko Rashtrapati puraskar do !!