Rick F

A man from the late 1900s trying to make sense of the 21st century

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

@severindicroce username: root
password: pass

shhh don't tell anyone

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

To the woman near me in the gym: I wasn't checking you out, I was just checking to see if you had headphones in because I had to fart

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

I keep in shape so when the zombie apocalypse happens I'll be one of the fast zombies

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

I saw Apr and read it as Aug and said "WHAT THE FUCK IT'S AUGUST ALREADY?!!"

My concept of time is destroyed

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

Why yes, you are correct. I am trash. Thanks for noticing

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

let's take a minute to respect that someone, somewhere said "You know what, the hell with that, batteries ARE included" and everybody else just went with it

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

My gift to the world after I die will be my cause of death in my obituary. For all you nosy people

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

@dcimonkey Amazing that the car stayed upright

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

There's no way anybody can definitively prove that Stephen Hawking never said "fuck them kids" at some point in his life

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

Don't talk to me until I've had my coffee. To be clear, I'll still be an asshole after coffee. I just don't like talking to people. Because I'm an asshole

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

Getting older means finding humor in people not laughing at your jokes

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

A long time ago I promised myself I'd never be a bad mother. I'm a guy so it's biologically impossible for me to be a mother. Set attainable goals people

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

LPT: If you would prefer someone would not tag you in pictures on FB saying the words "stop fucking tagging me in your fucking pictures" will get them to stop

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

I, too, do not give a shit about your charitable donations for your birthday on FB

#bitchingaboutfacebook

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

@SXDintheMorning This says otherwise; https://t.co/EHcuklLcDT

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

I was totally judging the guy in the gym who was judging me. I think he was judging me. I was judging him by assuming he was judging me. I was intimidated by his muscles ok, fine. Why are you judging me?

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

@SXDintheMorning I hated how Rian Johnson didn't talk to JJ at all. Yo guys, it's the same movie series. Sequential in fact. Maaaaybe you should have talked about it

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

currently bracing for the onslaught of car/truck dash temperature pics

[Neo Geo World Tour @neogeoworldtour]

#NGWT2 is coming to Super @MAGFest in Washington DC, USA on 3-6 Jan 2019! Featured tournaments include #KOF98, #KOFXIV, #Garou MotW, Twinkle Star Sprites & #MetalSlug Score Attack.

🔥Register now!🔥
https://t.co/p8iOYldk3N

@SNKPofficial @SNKAofficial @snk_oda @brookgamingfans

[Rick F @DashFieldpaint]

OH SHIT IT'S SNOWING IN AN AREA WHERE SNOW IS ACTUALLY FAIRLY COMMON