Deaconblue

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

http://t.co/TCHYuu2AuV Cheated on Twitter with my real life today.

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

http://t.co/WSndUnRgAN i have a favorite bike in spin class it looks just like my bed and also its my bed

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

http://t.co/ixSmO0LETY I'm going on an all breadcrumb diet because I've never seen a duck with a double chin.

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

http://t.co/Y1ZvSrldMv A polaroid is what an eskimo takes when he wants to bulk up.

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

http://t.co/O3Kwg8jNfc will not get a cent of my money until they can tell me which apes I came from. http://t.co/uxL79kX0WY

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

At the Playboy Mansion I bet they serve fancy whore d'oeuvres before the main intercourse. http://t.co/JMSkGyiLWj

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

http://t.co/jGe0gaO4qC You can learn a lot about a person just by watching them through binoculars 24 hours a day.

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

http://t.co/bc5tFu9Xgu my hate for filling up ice cube trays outweighs my love for cold beverages.

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

Sorry your dad died. Here's a card with a waterfall on it http://t.co/j0Jk93BuR7

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

http://t.co/SpsmD6YOWX I got 99 problems and they're all friend requests from people I didn't like in high school.

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

http://t.co/kA4XmMXGFU "It's not you, it's me. " - twins looking at family photos

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

http://t.co/qgDUPhn7mU Ceilings were just ambitious walls.

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

Rubbing my ass on these documents because the boss's email says to "cheek his paperwork". http://t.co/fELaNpVqVl

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

http://t.co/A6elYlcjQU Ceilings were just ambitious walls.

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

http://t.co/6R8bhGSLk1 I wish I lived in the 1950's, because I have a few songs I want to record about my postman.

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

I bet when you go to hell they make you wear your hair like you did in 5th grade http://t.co/1LqGQMDP8s

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

It's wisest to pick the side of the person who knows the most shit about you http://t.co/40bg4nBMFK

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

Ran out of Manila envelops. Off to the Philippines. http://t.co/FOAHc3fmIL

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

I bet when you go to hell they make you wear your hair like you did in 5th grade http://t.co/mjiSTl0HI7

[Deaconblue @Deaconblue]

Ceilings were just ambitious walls. http://t.co/BoWxFZXcao