Alyssa

comedian, discerner of truth, girl danger, lover of life and a pursuer of happiness

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

My life is FULL of nice juicy surprises lol

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

@DrPhil you can’t tell who’s lying more, the Mom, the Dad, or that fiancé! These people need to realize it’s not about you it’s about them

[Saturday Night Live @nbcsnl]

“You can’t tell me what to do with my body.” – @Lesdoggg #SNLFinale

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

@benshapiro Oh they realize it and they still thing women’s decisions should be their choice and Nobody else’s. It’s sad when Porn sites feel the need to get involved in basic issues.

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

@ScottWesterfeld is there anyway to message you about your writing process?

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

@ScottWesterfeld you know they made all those other books into movies, by far the uglies series was the best. Why not your books? Those books are still relevant today even, if not more!

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

@realDonaldTrump With a vote

[Seattle Seahawks @Seahawks]

It's time.....SEA!!!

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

@realDonaldTrump @SquawkCNBC @JoeSquawk Go to bed #sleep #rest

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

Live for being the best you can be. Be the kindest you can be to everyone. Be the most giving, loving, respectful, strong, and most of all vulnerable you can. It isn’t easy but it’s worth the risk.

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

@awatazzz Yaaaaaas

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

@FLOTUS I loved the video. But I also loved that you kept the First Ladies feet conveniently out of shot the whole time lol

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

@realDonaldTumpr @PressSec @realDonaldTrump @POTUS @FLOTUS I’ll only vote you if you promise that Russia won’t get involved 😈

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

@realDonaldTumpr @PressSec @realDonaldTrump @POTUS @FLOTUS That hilarious

[The Ellen Show @TheEllenShow]

Care. Love. Be outraged. Be devastated. Just don’t give up. The world needs good humans today.

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

Adam is suuuuuuuch a player #bachelorinpardise #BachelorNation

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

If you didn't want Sarah to take Adam then you shouldn't have given your BLESSING!! #BIP #BachelorNation

[Alyssa @DeathToll2123]

#BacheloretteFinale  but I could cause I saw it with Peter but he wouldn't give me what I wanted right now and I have to have what I want 😑