deepamatic

Tweets (?) are mostly unpopular opinions (all mine)

[GEOFF @geoffreywoo]

funding story:

founder sends me an ugly loom at 11:47pm.

no brand-name angels.
no fancy deck.
no “ai operating system for x” nonsense.

just a screen recording showing one customer workflow that used to take 3 people and now takes 11 minutes.

that is the entire game.

capital does not need theater when the before and after is violent enough.

the best seed pitch is often just proof that the buyer’s old process now looks embarrassing.

[David ImeI @DurvidImel]

2026

[Toby Harnden @tobyharnden]

15 years since I was asked by @Telegraph to write a photo caption for a royal kiss and decided to go with something completely different that happened that day

[Yam Peleg @Yampeleg]

The dumbest person you know is being told 'you are absolutely right' by some LLM right now.

[No Context Brits @NoContextBrits]

The “why won’t this fucking drawer open” starter pack.

[deepamatic @deepamatic]

@fahdananta @grok @fahdananta Can confirm Nexus did not work at Pearson this morning. Reg lines were cray. MPC wasn’t terrible

[Paul Graham @paulg]

Initially I was surprised at people's ability to ignore evidence leading to conclusions they don't like, even with multiple videos of the scene. But then I remembered that 34% of Americans don't believe in evolution.

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.

$30 per seat per month.

$1.4 million annually.

I called it "digital transformation."

The board loved that phrase.

They approved it in eleven minutes.

No one asked what it would actually do.

Including me.

I told everyone it would "10x productivity."

That's not a real number.

But it sounds like one.

HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.

I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."

They stopped asking.

Three months later I checked the usage reports.

47 people had opened it.

12 had used it more than once.

One of them was me.

I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.

It took 45 seconds.

Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.

But I called it a "pilot success."

Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.

The CFO asked about ROI.

I showed him a graph.

The graph went up and to the right.

It measured "AI enablement."

I made that metric up.

He nodded approvingly.

We're "AI-enabled" now.

I don't know what that means.

But it's in our investor deck.

A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.

I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."

He asked what that meant.

I said "compliance."

He asked which compliance.

I said "all of them."

He looked skeptical.

I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."

He stopped asking questions.

Microsoft sent a case study team.

They wanted to feature us as a success story.

I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."

I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.

They didn't verify it.

They never do.

Now we're on Microsoft's website.

"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."

The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.

He got 3,000 likes.

He's never used Copilot.

None of the executives have.

We have an exemption.

"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."

I wrote that policy.

The licenses renew next month.

I'm requesting an expansion.

5,000 more seats.

We haven't used the first 4,000.

But this time we'll "drive adoption."

Adoption means mandatory training.

Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.

But completion will be tracked.

Completion is a metric.

Metrics go in dashboards.

Dashboards go in board presentations.

Board presentations get me promoted.

I'll be SVP by Q3.

I still don't know what Copilot does.

But I know what it's for.

It's for showing we're "investing in AI."

Investment means spending.

Spending means commitment.

Commitment means we're serious about the future.

The future is whatever I say it is.

As long as the graph goes up and to the right.

[andy peacock @AndyPeacock999]

100% of Gazans are actually being attacked if they stay at home

[horse dentist @equine__dentist]

the only flag i salute

[Andrea Junker @Strandjunker]

On this May Day, let us remember that it wasn’t the CEOs and billionaires who saved us during COVID-19. It was the janitors, nurses, cleaning crews, grocery and food workers with their hard, often invisible labor.

[Hon. Lisa MacCormack Raitt P.C. @lraitt]

Even the lobsters know.

[Work Retire Die @WorkRetireDie]

Severance is a show brave enough to ask the question, what is life at Deloitte like?

[Dan Shafer @DanRShafer]

finally, some good news

[deepamatic @deepamatic]

@mprkhrst @amasad 🙋‍♀️

[Gary Shteyngart @Shteyngart]

"They're eating the cats, they're eating the dogs" proved a more effective message than "Let me help you buy your first house."

[Edward @somefoundersalt]

fun fact: docusign has more employees (7,000) than an full strength roman legion at the height of the empire (5,200)

[deepamatic @deepamatic]

@vincestaples 🙋‍♀️