DemoniaKitten

Strange chick, thinking strange thoughts. SAHM. Surviving life daily. Corgi lover. Cannabis enthusiast. Mental health advocate. Vegetarian.

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

@christyjc1 Oh fuck 😂

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

Silas, 4, walked up to me going “my penis is out.”
Dude straight up was pulling his penis out the side of his underwear.
Boy mom life is wild.

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

Me, damn it!
Silas (4), what?
Me, I messed up my eyeliner.
Silas, you can just take it off and try again. That would not have been a good style.

😂😂😂

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

Husband gets a little nosebleed.
Silas, 4, “I didn’t want to see peoples blood!! Only kid blood.”

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

Silas, 4, (mad) don’t call my cheeseburger a tiny hamburger!!!!!!

Things I never thought I’d be yelled at for.

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

Silas, 4 yo: my brain rocket shipped out of my head and broke the house.
Me: what??
Silas: it came back.

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

Silas, 4: (pushes little brother, 11 months)
Me: you can’t push him, use your words.
Silas: it’s like a video game.

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

Me (spills food on the stove)
Silas (4yo) “what did I tell you about being careful?”

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

Silas (4yo) : Mama. I hear a big noise out front. It might be a yeti or something.

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

What I would give to smell this Visine like bottle of Barbie perfume I had when I was kid.

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

Silas (4yo) story: I got on a bears back and it started wiggling and I fell off and it bit my head. It’s going to come back in ten days and bite it again.

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

A Silas (4yo) story: “purple jellyfish can turn you into a skeleton and then back. Many times.”

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

Jesus fuck these people are annoying.
These people are my family.

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

(Me in the kitchen)
3yo: (watching a tv show he’s seen, screams runs into kitchen with his hand on his heart) “it was scary my heart almost popped out!!!”

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

(Me cuddling 3yo)
3yo: move your boobies! Not comfy.
Me: Dude. I know.

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

Husband: (reading bedtime story)
3yo: PAUSE. I need my water.
Husband: hands him water, he drinks
3yo: Unpause

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

3yo: wyd?
Me: cleaning the bathroom
3yo: (lifts toilet seat and inspects) good job momma! MIMI COME LOOK!”
Me: SUPER UNNECESSARY.

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

Me: wanna put your pants on?
3 yo: no, I’m gunna eat apples.

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

I can be that person, you just have to light that fire.

[DemoniaKitten @DemoniaKitten]

Me on the toilet.
3 year old bursts in: my penis hurts!!! I zoom and my penis owwww.
Boys are wild 😂