Spog Sog

Swears like sailor & drinks like a fish, Should live by the coast? Fav Quote: 'If you have to be a pig, be a prize pig'. When I grow up I want to be Hank Moody

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

Apparently "In full HD" is not the right answer to "How do you view lesbian relationships" :p

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

Cop: Please step out of the vehicle.

Me: I'm too drunk... you get in!

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

But then how do they stop the sharks? https://t.co/6RrBzsTisG

[Coalition to Stop Gun Violence @CSGV]

⚠️ Unfortunately we must issue the following warning ⚠️ DO NOT SHOOT YOUR GUNS AT THE HURRICANE!!! 🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️https://t.co/diS56jWInX

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

Last night I hosted a seminar on delaying orgasms...

Nobody Came!

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

Things could always be worse... Just imagine if sex was fattening.

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

Overheard: "Hi.
Ek is dringend opsoek na 'n Ford Kuga 1.6 EcoBoost, vir my skoonma.
Thanx"

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

Can you please just find someone else already and make them miserable instead!

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

So when is it White Friday?
#AllFridaysMatter #BlackFriday

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

Are you motherfuckers ready for the new shit?

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

Knuckle crack the bone, twenty one to win

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

Me: *wins a Pokemon battle* This is my greatest accomplishment.

Wife: Uh, you have four kids.

Me: You're right. I should tell them I won.

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

Just tried to kill a roach with Axe Body Spray, now it's name is Brett & he won't shut up about crossfit!

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

"The only thing wrong with being an atheist is that there's nobody to talk to during an orgasm." ~Anon

[Trendsmap Jo'burg @TrendsJoBurg]

'anal' is now trending in #Johannesburg https://t.co/IVisF6BNzD

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

I feel sorry for the USA. It's like you have to eat shit and your only choice is whether you use a spoon or a fork.

[Kaptein Kortbroek @tune_jou_once]

Reguit hel toe vir my...

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

I'm seriously contemplating remarrying my ex-wife, but I'm pretty sure she'll figure out that I'm just after my money.

[Spog Sog @DieSpogSog]

Apparently one in three people cheat.

I wonder if it's my wife or my girlfriend?