Someone

I'm not really special, hear the ramblings of a lone soul

[Someone @Disonnance]

The true problem is just outside the box.

[Someone @Disonnance]

Don't you find it dumb, yet reasonable that something that should guide humanity should be something that isn't humanity itself ? As in, bringing all human biases as far away from what could bring true justice, regardless of gender, party, race, choices and beliefs ?

[Someone @Disonnance]

This world tends to remind me every now and then how mad it feels. People in power being tone-deaf, people bringing power as a movement being stuck in a daily loop. When will humanity truly rise ?

[Someone @Disonnance]

Is there even such a thing as being just one step away from everything constantly ? As in i never truly fit in whenever i'm with circles with whom i'm supposed to share common interests ?

[Someone @Disonnance]

Is there even such a thing as being the exception to literally everything i can share something in common with ?

[Someone @Disonnance]

Being loved only for the pleasure you can bring is just unfair. I hope one day i can meet someone that can complete me.

[Someone @Disonnance]

Ever feel like meeting new people when you feel meh and distance yourself from everyone forever hoping they take you as granted and make you feel special in your "meh" times ?

I get it, i get those moments too every now and then.

If only meeting new people was easy though.

[Someone @Disonnance]

I guess i expected confetti flying outta nowhere when i finally "had my first time". The internet has...kinda played with my expectations. I guess i will never get to be a wizard, but sex really isn't that special. What's truly special is to feel loved for more than it.

[Someone @Disonnance]

Oh right, i'm also in a relationship since three months. No one knows it. I guess that's something I've achieved. Yet unsurprisingly, i still sometimes feel like downplaying what i successfully get. It's weird.

[Someone @Disonnance]

I learned the hard way that you cannot just fit in a group of friends. I always did tend to feel left out, while it could be my confidence, i just never struck people with my presence. Life goes on, i'll turn the page.

[Someone @Disonnance]

Yeah sex is cool but ever got someone who truly loves you for who you are

[Someone @Disonnance]

For someone sprouting negative thinking processes, i fantasize quite a lot on happy-go-lucky kind, tender and loving people.

Just drown me in reassurance, warm hugs, and whisper sweetly to my ear that everything will be okay already

[Someone @Disonnance]

It's strange to mainly focus on what you do and not who you are

Then wonder why others only like what you do and not who you are

Because you don't like who you are and you'd rather focus on what you do

[Someone @Disonnance]

I feel like i achieve more by impacting people's days positively than what i usually do for my own self.

Must be because seeing that i can positively contribute and make a good impact around makes me feel like i'm truly existing

[Someone @Disonnance]

I'm too much of a coward to face my own thoughts or actions. I'd rather do it all blindly and not look back at what I've done, if possible.

I don't know, is it possible to be self-aware and cringey at the same time ?

Oh wait, i just don't like myself

[Someone @Disonnance]

I'm confident a lot of people nowadays live through their days with the faint hope of "the world slightly improving into a better place each day" as a source of determination.

Not gonna lie, that's some strength right there.

[Someone @Disonnance]

I'm convinced there's multiple kinds of feeling empty. Be it just being depressive, or plainly boring.

You eventually walk it off with various nuances of "meh".

[Someone @Disonnance]

I used to envy talented people who got it better than me. Once i reached their level with time, i didn't feel as satisfied as i thought.

It just feels like checking a checkbox, then carrying on, searching for something else to pursue.

[Someone @Disonnance]

Sometimes, i wonder if i'm lazy or just waiting for the right moment.

Then i wonder again if it isn't just plain laziness.

[Someone @Disonnance]

It feels weird to forgive yourself for a mistake done years ago. It's because it feels wrong when said mistake still had negative consequences.