i have beautiful hair but it always looks like shit bc in the winter it’s -20 degrees and dry as fuck and in the summer it’s 1000% humidity and i bike everywhere so im sweating like a damn pig. when does Brigid win…..
People who enjoy lying for fun often overestimate their skill. The world's bartenders and taxi drivers are forced to nod and smile at people who think they're being quirky for doing high-school improv with themselves
ppl who are like “im soooo sorry i have such a bad memory” when they forget basic things & it’s like. ok well get a better one. do some word puzzles or something
my sister called a very muscular tv actor “skinny” and i was like, if u saw some of the malnourished freaks that i get off on you would lose your lunch. but her husband is basically the size of a refrigerator so i suppose it all checks out
backrooms is such a major blow against fat girl summer. like SORRY i cant crawl through some of those little spaces bc of my GIANT ASS i guess the monster is gonna get me 🙄
pulled out the string bikini at the beach today, the water was absolutely disgusting & my shoulders got a bit sunburnt, it was awesome i am NOT fucking around this year