The Swag Master🇺🇸

Professional farm merge valley player He/They

[The Swag Master🇺🇸 @DMS3tm]

What's happening? The world is literally ending.

[The Swag Master🇺🇸 @DMS3tm]

I’m still healing from knowing fiery Doritos tacos locos are never coming back as a permanent menu item

[𝓲𝓬𝓮 @be_like_ice]

POV: the part of healing that no one talks about.

[The Swag Master🇺🇸 @DMS3tm]

@evergypower your workers deserve to get their ass ate I love them

[The Swag Master🇺🇸 @DMS3tm]

Don’t break no contact. Never break a promise you make to yourself

[Delux @001Delux]

Delete that paragraph king

she don’t give a fuck

[The Swag Master🇺🇸 @DMS3tm]

Everything that happens is part of Gods ultimate plan

[The Swag Master🇺🇸 @DMS3tm]

Ppl luv doin weird sht to u til u start doin stranger things

[The Swag Master🇺🇸 @DMS3tm]

@yettixbandz @OleSaintPat Stealing this

[YettiBandz @yettixbandz]

Ppl luv doin weird sht to u til u start doin stranger things

[The Swag Master🇺🇸 @DMS3tm]

I’m trying really hard to ignore it

[samantha @mobilesuitsam]

when you can see the pattern repeating

[Angel @angedipus]

My sexting ass could never be a politican

[assley titsdale @asslytitsdale]

where’s the dating app for going on walks and making out

[The Swag Master🇺🇸 @DMS3tm]

#bisexual #Mexican

[micheal @godsb0y]

got chick fil a for dinner

[The Swag Master🇺🇸 @DMS3tm]

My sus coworker just picked me up and threw me in the air. What the fuck…. Why did I kinda like it

[JP @jpbrammer]

the phrase "lipstick on a pig" has always inspired a deep sadness in me. I think of the pig, looking forward to her big night out, and I bring myself to the verge of tears.

[Paul @orangepaulp]

average Carrie Miranda interaction

[The Swag Master🇺🇸 @DMS3tm]

Nvm my MacBook is charged #MLKDay

[The Swag Master🇺🇸 @DMS3tm]

Electricity is out and my phones about to die…. Good bye everyone

[The Swag Master🇺🇸 @DMS3tm]

An associate at my local #Walmart was racist to me to me this morning @Walmart @WalmartWorld @WalmartCAGaming @WalmartNews @walmart