Done With Fine

For the man who's said "I'm fine" for years and knows it isn't true. No more waiting out the storm. Walk into it.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

I'm done with fine.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

A man answers "busy" every time you ask about work. Ask a second question and he talks for twenty minutes.

"Counsel in the heart of man is like deep water; but a man of understanding will draw it out." (Proverbs 20:5)

The first answer is the surface. Ask the second question.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

Notice the dad who coaches every season his kids play.

Practice plans, snack schedules, rides home. He's around men all week, and none of them are his friends. They're parents he manages.

After the last game, ask the assistant coach to grab a burger.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

Two guys on a framing crew have worked together a year and only talk about lumber prices.

When Paul got to Corinth he found Aquila, "and because he practiced the same trade, he lived with them and worked." (Acts 18:3)

That friendship started on the job. Ask him to lunch.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

Notice how a man says "we're good" about his marriage when you didn't ask.

An answer nobody asked for is usually one he's been rehearsing.

Don't push. Just tell him, "If it ever isn't, I'm the guy you can call." Then mean it.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

A man's buddy slips after two years sober. He's too ashamed to call anyone.

Before Peter failed, Jesus told him, "I prayed for you, that your faith wouldn't fail. You, when once you have turned again, establish your brothers." (Luke 22:32)

Call him tonight.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

Notice the man at the hospital who handles every form, every call, and every insurance question for his mom.

He's had a clipboard in his hands for three days, and nobody has asked how he's sleeping.

Bring him real food. Ask about him, not her.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

A man's brother lives three states away. The neighbor two doors down has jumper cables, a truck, and no idea the man's marriage is in trouble.

"Better is a neighbor who is near than a distant brother." (Proverbs 27:10)

Knock on the door you can actually reach.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

Notice the man who always offers to drive.

He decides when the night ends, and he can keep his eyes on the road instead of on you.

The driver's seat is a comfortable place to hide. Ride shotgun this time and ask him the real question.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

A man's been out of work four months. Most friends quit asking. One still brings coffee on Tuesdays.

Paul, chained in Rome, wrote that Onesiphorus "often refreshed me, and was not ashamed of my chain." (2 Timothy 1:16)

Go find your man.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

Notice how a man answers "how's work?" in the truck compared to across a table.

Eyes on the road, nobody has to hold a stare. The real answer tends to show up around the second stoplight.

Offer him a ride this week. Take the long way home.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

A man gets news at work that could sink him. Before anyone else, he texts two friends: "Pray. I'll explain tonight."

With his life on the line, Daniel went home and told his three companions so they'd ask God for mercy. (Daniel 2:17-18)

Name your three.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

In a 2021 survey, 54% of Americans had texted a friend in the past 24 hours. 30% had talked to one on the phone.

A text can say "all good" with a thumbs-up. A voice is harder to fake. Call one man on the drive home today.

https://t.co/p4Q8a4SEK3

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

Notice the man who jump-starts a stranger's car in the grocery store lot and won't take the twenty.

Ask how he's doing and you'll get "can't complain."

Plenty of men will show up for your dead battery before they admit their own is low. Ask him again, slower.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

Paul had survived a shipwreck and was headed to Rome as a prisoner. Believers came out to meet him at the Three Taverns. "When Paul saw them, he thanked God, and took courage." (Acts 28:15)

Friends on the road gave the apostle courage. Be that for one man this week.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

Notice how long you've been "about to" call your brother.

Weeks turn into a season. Then it's his birthday, and a text feels easier than explaining the gap.

Skip the explanation. Call him, and open with the reason he came to mind.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

22% of Americans say it's been at least five years since they made a new friend. (Survey Center on American Life, 2021)

Five years is a lot of Saturdays. Spend the next one with a man you barely know yet, like a neighbor or the dad from practice.

https://t.co/p4Q8a4SEK3

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

Notice the man at the gym at 5 a.m. every day who never talks to anyone.

Headphones in, same machine, same routine. Some of that is discipline. Some of it is a man who found the one place nobody asks him anything.

Next time, nod and learn his name. Start there.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

Years after Jonathan died, King David asked, "Is there yet any left of the house of Saul, that I may show him kindness for Jonathan's sake?" (2 Samuel 9:1)

He found Jonathan's son and gave him a seat at his table for life.

Your late friend's kid is grown now. Call him.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

Moses' hands grew heavy holding the staff up over the battle. Aaron and Hur sat him on a stone and held his hands up, one on each side, until sunset. (Exodus 17:11-12)

Even Moses needed two men beside him. Find yours before the battle, not during it.

[Done With Fine @DoneWithFine]

Notice the man who volunteers to work the grill at every cookout.

He gets two hours alone with a spatula, and everyone thanks him for it. Nobody asks how he's really doing, because he looks busy.

Next cookout, bring him a plate and stand by the grill for ten minutes.