Freedom from… 🇺🇸 @donovanpage10 - Twitter Profile

Good morning. Let’s talk about renting a house with a pool. First, you dip one of those little test strips in the water. Then you stare at it like you’re a forensic scientist. “Okay… that one is kinda purple. This one is pinkish. Maybe orange?” Then comes the fun part — figuring out what chemicals to add. But you can’t add TOO much, because apparently there’s a fine line between crystal-clear pool water and climbing out without your skin. Which, depending on what you’re into, might not necessarily be a dealbreaker. Then you start reading everything you’re supposed to monitor: Chlorine. pH. Alkalinity. Calcium hardness. Urine. (Just checking to see if you were still reading.) And approximately 37 other things I don’t understand. Then there’s cleaning the bottom. I COULD hook up the pool vacuum to the pump and actually vacuum it myself. Or… I can throw the little pool robot in there and spend the next three hours watching it slowly drive around the bottom like a Roomba that learned how to swim. Obviously, option two. Now, last year the backyard had a little incident during what was supposed to be a simple cleaning. That eventually resulted in the whole thing getting redone with new concrete. Looks great. There is, however, one minor feature nobody mentioned: When the South Carolina sun comes out, the concrete reaches approximately the temperature of the surface of Mercury. You don’t walk across it. You sprint. So now I’m standing at a house I RENT, holding a test strip I don’t understand, surrounded by enough chemicals to make me look suspicious, hopping across scorching concrete while watching an aquatic Roomba clean somebody else’s pool. And somehow this is just a normal morning. Calcium hardness. Alkalinity. pH. Chlorine. Whatever the purple square means. Thank God for Grok. 😂