Restaurant Bitch

if i hear even the slightest utterance of double the tax your party is over.

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

Let's replace "double the tax" with "give me enough money to walk the fuck out of this hell hole and never return"

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

I wonder how @realDonaldTrump tips.. I feel like it could really go either way..

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

But what if I actually did spit in your food..

jk..

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

Waitress Haiku:
Oh, sugar packets
Your kid makes me want to die
Sticky salt shakers

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

New company policy, refills are conditionally free. I decide the conditions.

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

Did that bitch just ask for dressing on the side..

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

Never have I ever wanted to head butt someone as bad as when the 7 top of women ask for separate checks.

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

You ate your entire meal and then complained it was too cold.. Cool.

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

I straight smell like a Chinese restaurant. I don't work at a Chinese restaurant..

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

Oh, you're just here for dessert? Fucking Awesome.

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

Two women. Three women. Four women. Death.

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

This. http://t.co/nRPpWAs5sC

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

"It's really hotttt in heree" Yeah, because you won't shut the fuck up.

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

Just waking up #lifeofaserver

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

Me no want to work..

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

Uhh yeap that one IS vegetarian.

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

This job makes me hate humanity..

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

I'm not sure if my job title should be server or alcoholic..

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

If only I knew how much my table was going to tip me before I waited on them..

[Restaurant Bitch @DoubleTheTax]

More make up does not mean more tips, honey.