The fastest way to become successful:
Associate with people more successful than you. This results in some of the fastest learning and behavior change you can experience.
The problem is... they will not want anything to do with you. So you have to find ONE thing you're more successful than them at, and give that thing freely. Not at cost. Not tit for tat. Freely. Without expectation.
It's an unspoken code of people who are "higher up" - they're almost all givers. The easiest way to see someone who is "out of place" is to spot the taker. Spot the person always angling.
Anyways once you do actually provide value (help them do something good they couldn't do before or help them avoid something bad they used to have to deal with, or get the same outcome they're used to faster or cheaper)... they'll let you hang around.
Then you learn as much as you possibly can and try and be the best in that group at. When that happens they'll see you as a leader. You won't even have to say it. The power dynamics will just shift.
Alex Hormozi
Growth will always stretch you beyond your comfort, so get used to discomfort and delayed gratification if you’re really chasing a goal.
Pain is the price of progress.
I've never written about the funniest. I've only shared it with about 4 people here.
Years back, during my Masters, the feminists reported me to my school, dropping allegations against me to get me expelled and sent home. I was in London when I got the call to come to school for a security meeting. I had 2 meetings - one with my school and one with my faculty.
The allegations:
- He is a misogynist
- He is anti LGBTQ
- He promotes Patriarchy and does not believe in gender equality.
- He calls women prostitutes 🤦♂️
- He promotes hate speech.
They attached tweets and sent. I opened my twitter, gave them context and explained. They found no violation. Instead, the school told me I was an ambassador of the school and should carry myself as such. Then they tried to tell me to tame the way I write, to avoid conflict. I simply told them I would not write to suit or pacify anybody because that makes it a controlled speech. I explained that anyone's opinion is subject to multiple interpretations, and that is okay. It is not my responsibility to get them to make them understand it.
They talked about how embassies and employers look at social media and it is important you don't give them reason to deny you. I just shrugged. I refuse to police my tweet for visa.
In all of this, the idea that I was reported so I could lose my admission and be sent home was funny because I was already looking to come back to 9ja in few years. I wouldn't have minded moving back home earlier. I am not stateless. When I shared with my friends, they laughed and said, "you wey wan go back 9ja." But they found the report to school, ridiculous.
In the end, if Okonjo-Iweala could be reported to Harvard to withdraw her certificate, who am I? I promise you, you do not know how toxic this app has been. Only reason I never shared this before was that I didn't want to give anyone that relevance.
Silent treatment, when used wisely, isn’t about punishing people or creating emotional confusion but it’s about reclaiming your calm.
Growing up in a military home taught me that silence can be a form of discipline, self-control and emotional maturity. Instead of reacting impulsively or saying things I might regret, I’ve learned to withdraw just enough to think clearly before responding.
This doesn’t mean shutting people out or using silence as a weapon. It means choosing peace over unnecessary arguments, choosing clarity over emotional chaos and refusing to match anyone’s loudness with more loudness.
When silence is used to protect your mental space, gather your thoughts, or avoid conflict, it becomes a powerful personal tool not to hurt others, but to maintain self-respect.
Real strength is knowing when to speak, when to stay quiet and when silence is simply your way of staying in control of your emotions.
Be guided accordingly 👏
Many of you watched my videos in late 2023…
But what you didn't know is that in many of those videos, I was blind.
In late 2023, I was diagnosed with a brain tumor.
I went from seeing well to becoming partially blind.
But the work couldn't stop.
We had brand commitments, and videos that we had to shoot.
So there I was, in front of the camera, unable to read the script in my hand.
My manager had to read the lines out to me, line by line.
We did take after take.
It got to the point that even my videographer couldn't use the professional lights because my eyes were too sensitive to the brightness.
It was just four of us then:
Me, my manager, videographer, and writer.
They became my eyes when I didn't have mine.
A few days ago, as the director yelled "Action" on a new shoot, I paused.
And then I remembered that I could now see it all.
I'm not just grateful for the vision.
I'm grateful for the people who held the vision when I couldn't see it.
Sometimes, you don't know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.
But more importantly, you don't know how blessed you are until you have people who will be strong for you.
The picture below is from when I checked into the hospital immediately after finding out there was a tumor in my brain.
@Doctor_Chichi@arthurosadebe@Nnam_di243 Please ma'am, I've been trying to send in my entry since but it keeps failing.
Please do I still get a chance at being among? Can you suggest an alternative way I can use in sending in my entry?
Thank you.
@jon_d_doe There will always be fight in marriage, the reason our parent stays longer in marriage was because they were patners who fight, love, communicate, support and help eachother to grow and raised their children…so witnessing it is part of educational experience.
I’m scared. All I want is to live.I don’t want to die. Please believe me when I say something is wrong. My breast is swollen, and I desperately need help 😢 😭 😿 😢 😭 😿 😢
So, Aunty Esther been strong for a while and still hustling like she’s fine. She’s always inspired me with her consistency and hustle spirit. Let’s all come together to help her fight this.
You people like Aunty Esther ooo. My phone has ben buzzing. It's unfortunate she didn't listen earlier when we wanted to take her to the hospital. It wouldn't have gotten this bad. She is running out of time.
I have spoken to @the_beardedsina. He will book an appointment with an oncologist for her. When we get the prognosis and the cost of treatment, we will raise it for her.
Let's hear from the oncologist first. Everything will be made public as usual. Thank you all for your concern 🙏🏾