College Drunk

Tweeting the average drunk mind.

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

You know someone's hot when you hold your finger on the snapchat for all 10 seconds

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING NOW!!!

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

If y'all think the Zimmerman trial is the biggest problem in America...friendly reminder..Obama is still our president.

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

love is when someone asks for a starburst and u give them a red or pink one

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

S/O to everybody's livers celebratin Merica and shit yesterday

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

🔵🔵🔵🔵🔵🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴
🔵🔵🔵🔵🔵⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪
🔵🔵🔵🔵🔵🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴
🔵🔵🔵🔵🔵⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪
🔵🔵🔵🔵🔵🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴
⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪
🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴
⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪⚪
🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴🔴
#MERICA

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

if you’re going to insult me please give me 24 hours notice so i can come up with a comeback

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

Sometimes I will just get annoyed with people randomly. Like I don’t even have a real reason but their presence just bothers me.

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

Sex is so weird like hey I love you let me stick my hard extra limb into ur tiny hole and then slam it into u repeatedly because I love you

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

r u a sofa bc ur sofaking annoying

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

if u ever feel bad about yourself just think about the people who use their selfies as their lock screen or wallpaper

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

pool party at my house, bring ur own pool

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

Luke Bryan says Call me 3 times, She calls. Kenny Chesney says come over 5 times , She comes over... I text her one time, She never replies

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

Remember back in like 5th grade when everyone vowed they would never do drugs or drink? Yeah that went to hell.

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

Alcohol... A lot cheaper than a therapist.

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

ㅤ

ㅤRT to fuck peoples timeline

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

Not texting back is only okay when I do it

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

You drink too much, swear too much and your morals are questionable. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

Shout out to my parents for not wearing a condom and creating the most awesome person alive..

[College Drunk @Drunk_College_]

A margarita sounds good right now.. Or 2.. Or 3..