Drunk DINGER!!!

Parody Account | Tweet abt the Rockies, baseball in gen, & uncomfortable movie scenes where you think people are going to fight, but then kiss. #SellTheTeamDick

[Drunk DINGER!!! @Drunk_Dinger]

@KKTV11News Why does KKTV feel the need to constantly tweet random click-bait articles that aren’t major national news & have nothing to do with Colorado Springs? Articles like this are irrelevant to your viewers make people think COS is far more dangerous than reality. Be better, do better.

[Drunk DINGER!!! @Drunk_Dinger]

A statement from @Drunk_DINGER regarding the controversy at the end of yesterday’s #Rockies game: #SellTheFranchise #MonfortsADick

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One down. One to go! #SellTheFranchise #MonfortsADick

[Colorado Rockies @Rockies]

Rockies General Manager Jeff Bridich steps down and Greg Feasel has been named Club President.

[Drunk DINGER!!! @Drunk_Dinger]

Might be time to start taking the humidor on the road. #SellTheTeamDick

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The @Rockies are doing a hell of a job winning the time of possession. Take notes @johnelway @Broncos #MastersAtWork

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.@Rockies: https://t.co/KRLqTPdLob

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Pour gasoline on this fire Rox. I want to see triple digits. ‘Co’s

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This is a stupid, non-statistical take, but when he pitches @KFREE_21 just LOOKS like he gives a shit. Full body effort.

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The most worn out take on the LLWS is when the kids line up to shake hands.

“That’s the way it should be in the Bigs!” says some jerk from Des Moines.

No, Randy, I don’t give a shit about watching a bunch of paid professionals slap hands.

[Drunk DINGER!!! @Drunk_Dinger]

Prison overpopulation: coming to an NFL stadium near you.

[NFL Retweet @NFLRT]

Raiders Stadium in Vegas Will Contain a Small Jail for Fans

https://t.co/3K6jdDlqhW

[Drunk DINGER!!! @Drunk_Dinger]

@purpledinocast I WAS GETTING TO THAT.

I'm so alone.

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@purpledinocast Sincerely,
Late 20s guy who kills time masquerading as a degenerate version of a mascot nobody likes in the first place.

[Drunk DINGER!!! @Drunk_Dinger]

@purpledinocast As opposed to the mid-30s dorks who make dick jokes and weird noises on a podcast.

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@markkiszla The fanbase.

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Please @ me.

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@southstands303 Do we still have Osweiler?

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@azstsndvl @PoseidonsFist Imma pray for you.

[Drunk DINGER!!! @Drunk_Dinger]

Just fucking LOL at anybody who switched over to the Broncos preseason game.

[Drunk DINGER!!! @Drunk_Dinger]

Do I want the Broncos to be good this season: of course.

Do I also kind of want the Broncos to suck this season for the Twitter outrage and hot takes: OF COURSE.

[Drunk DINGER!!! @Drunk_Dinger]

@BrandonPerna @DemaryiusT That beard is patchier than a hand-me-down quilt in a family of moths. WYD Demaryius????