Drunk Report

Toasting & roasting the dumbest parts of this reality and the most absurd narratives that people fall for in the corporate press.

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

Bro figured out the anti-harassment code at pride is light jogging 🍻

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

@morpheusecho @PacifistHunter_ @BrianMikeKlein @TeamOssoff Nah, they’ve got the democrats on that one. When it comes to corruption the felonies are worse on their side. It just doesn’t excuse Trumps is all

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

@PacifistHunter_ @BrianMikeKlein @TeamOssoff That doesn’t answer why it’s relevant

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

@DiggingInTheDi1 @WomanDefiner Uh

[Paul @WomanDefiner]

@Bite_Fishing The lake isn't private. It's a public lake.

[Skeef @imskeef]

girl who chastised my brother for casually using the word “retarded” defending this on her instagram story with a rant so long you need 5 taps to get through it

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

@nexta_tv To be fair: this media personality is intensely retarded.

He’s not wrong.

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

@bavedikian @BestBuy @FedEx Hey @BestBuy why are you like this?

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

The modern definition of sexual harassment appears to be: “Please wear the outfit you picked for the scene we’re filming” 🤪

[Blake Lively is a Liar @BlakeLivelyLies]

Blake Lively unzipped the top of a scripted set wardrobe (a scene for It Ends With Us) to reveal the top of a lace bra. She covered this outfit with an unscripted coat which Justin Baldoni asked her to remove. When she removed it she told the NY Times she felt sexually harassed.

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

@iamgrandmaCarol @LauraLoomer @GrahamAllen So what? You people are pearl clutching weirdos

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

@fakechuck Why is it not shocking that there’s not even an attempt at an argument to discredit his claims

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

@PacifistHunter_ @BrianMikeKlein @TeamOssoff Yea. That sucks too. Worse, even.
But what’s the point? “They did it worse so ours is okay”?

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

Welcome to Clownworld 🤡

[Murray Rothbard @MurraySuggests]

The Iranian navy, which has been destroyed eight times, has apparently closed the Strait of Hormuz again, because the United States, for the seventh time, won the war that wasn’t a war, so now the United States has to open the Strait of Hormuz that was already open before the not-war began.

The not-war began because Iran had uranium that was totally, completely, beautifully obliterated, so they can’t build the nuclear bomb they weren’t building, which is why the United States had to start the not-war it definitely didn’t start.

Now the United States, which has nuclear weapons, is threatening to use nuclear weapons to stop Iran from getting nuclear weapons, because nuclear weapons are far too dangerous for countries with nuclear weapons to allow other countries to have.

If the United States saw the United States doing what the United States does in other countries, the United States would invade the United States to liberate the United States from the tyranny of the United States.

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

@BrianMikeKlein @TeamOssoff Is a guy with a rude tattoo really worse than billions in corruption?

Really?

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

@N0T_SJWS @SallyMayweather Why did he say he was gonna end it then?

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

The child star to paywall pipeline remains one of America’s strongest growth sectors

[TaraBull @TaraBull]

Former child YouTube star 18 year old Piper Rockelle claims she earned nearly $3 million in just 24 hours on her first day on OnIyF*ns

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

@IfindRetards

[factorydoge @factorydoge69]

im in physical pain from laughing wdym she bought and cooked decorative pasta 😭

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

@DiRico_Rants

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

@bAnthonYsr That’s pretty crazy that publicly saying you will kill someone in defense of your own life when threatened gets you cooked in American courts 🤡

[Drunk Report @DrunkReport]

🍻

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

@Kenneth_Belkin Do I look like I’m a part of the elite oligarch class. This was taken at a super 8 motel off I95 by the way.