Dumb Ass Dad®

My son could never do wrong!

[Matt @Mattmouton44]

They have some pretty girls in this world god blessed them well...

[Matt @Mattmouton44]

I'm moving to Seattle!#SaidNoOneEver

[Matt @Mattmouton44]

Fuck Seattle

[Common Penis® @CommmonPenis]

Rt this with your massive cock!

[Common Penis® @CommmonPenis]

Having a small penis is about as useful as having only a pen for a scantron test

[Dumb Ass Dad® @DumbAsssDad]

“@CommmonPenis: @UnusualFactPage I wish I knew what sex was like lol jk I have a 16 incher”

[Common Penis® @CommmonPenis]

I call my penis birthday candle mainly because bitches feel special blowing it.

[Common Penis® @CommmonPenis]

My dick is so nice, it tends to stand up so girls have a place to sit...

[Common Penis® @CommmonPenis]

My dick can never get comfortable because it's too big to fit in between my legs, so I usually get no sleep..

[Common Penis® @CommmonPenis]

I have a dig bick, you read that wrong lol but yes I do have a big dick btw

[Common Penis® @CommmonPenis]

I heard there was a party on your face...but I'm the only one cumming!

[Common Penis® @CommmonPenis]

I would talk about my dick...but hell that shit take way too long...

[Common Penis® @CommmonPenis]

Two things seen from outta space: Great Wall of China, and of course my dick!

[Matt @Mattmouton44]

🎶 Girl I gotta see you tonight, tonight, tonight 🎶

[Matt @Mattmouton44]

The Florida state players probably can't even spell "national championship"

[Matt @Mattmouton44]

🎶 tonight it's bottoms up🎶

[Matt @Mattmouton44]

Way to go Dallas way to go...

[Matt @Mattmouton44]

🎶 type of way 🎶

[Matt @Mattmouton44]

This "one day" craps getting old

[Dumb Ass Dad® @DumbAsssDad]

My son and he's friends are so nice..they always spray the house with air freshener before I get home!