Dungeons and Dadpuns

He/Him

Dad, DnD enthusiast, saxophone playing music loving nerd in general. Eat the rich.

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@CoraLinehan I've had the cake made. My wife cuts it. My conservative family leans in. It's yellow and black stripes.

Me: GET IT? GENDER IS A CONTRUCT HAHA!"

*Continues to eat cake while family packs up and leaves*

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@LaTiaJacquise Hah, I have a CPAP and I wake up and look over and I'm like "cool I slept for-" *reads screen* "oh."

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@RealCandaceO Ok, now I want a "Bring back manly puppets" shirt to hang next to my "America needs lesbian farmers" shirt.

Also I can absolutely believe you're tweeting this, because all you do is performative fake grievance garbage.

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@sarahditum "You can't hijack the dead for today's battles" I say as I do exactly that.

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@jaynooch "Oh. Fair."

*Removes some teeth, dribbling blood*

"Ish thish be'er?"

*Replyguy fleeing and screaming in terror*

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@ellle_em Literally nothing is stopping them from apologizing. So making it conditional just means they're only sorry if you forgive them and do the emotional labor and let them suffer less consequences

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@ellle_em If you're making an apology conditional on the acceptance of the apology, you're not sorry; you're attempting to mitigate the consequences you brought on yourself.

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@FranTownsend Look at the pretty flowers! Stop paying attention to my former warcrimes! Nothing to see here!

Very big "I'm not owned" energy.

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@FranTownsend @amychua @YaleLawSch Oh so we're just doing straight up intimidation of employees for speaking up about abuse and harrassment at Blizzard?

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@ohadelaide Miami Dice!

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@ohadelaide Hi are you my partner? 😂

I have watched that woman go from ball of anxiety to ray of sunshine in the course of one damn episode of My Favorite Murder.

Meanwhile it gives ME anxiety.

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@sbellelauren

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@Warcraft Cool words. Now fire the folks that enabled, turned a blind eye, engaged in, and perpetuated the actions that led to this.

Actions. This requires action. Not "reflection."

Consider that this was written by the folks that had the power to stop this and didn't.

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@HollyConrad

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@spradingaling Hahahaha FUCK.

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@SimplyAllegra Bah, she's BAEdou for a reason!

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@Browtweaten Alien: ok, well we don't care what happens to you, if you get sick and die, that's on you

Me: lmao

Alien: *visibly frustrated* Ok, them fine! While you suffer we're going to just hang out in space!

Me: *rolling in laughter and pointing to Richard Branson*

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@travismcelroy I was in a polyamorous relationship with all the video game posters that came with various Nintendo games.

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@WarploqueMinis Look, all I'm saying is I didn't realize I was bi until after I had been playing D&D for a year, so who's infiltrating who here?

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@belllmonts Literally me right now as I read this.

Huh.

[Dungeons and Dadpuns @Dungeonsanddad1]

@CriticalBard 100% can confirm.