Dylan

I tweet when im rly high so I can laugh later when I’m rly high

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

My dog in my room holding a steak knife while looking at a copy of Call of Duty in 2012

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

@elles_thots Hey thank you so much for tweeting this. I know the verified bot will bury my reaponse but fuck this really made me feel seen & knowing other people suffer the same way makes it less obsessive

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

I can’t believe my dad is dead. I’m really bad at keeping those close to me alive it seems

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

I went the majority of my 20s without even kissing a guy now I have a country wide roster eager to get into my guts. Life changes fast

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

My favorite top is moving to California and he wanted to spend his last night with me, tossing me around like a ragdoll. I’m a 6ft 150lb guy but this dude picked me up and pinned me like nothing. Called me the sexiest white boy ever and I should start an onlyfans. My life >

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

Yeah I feed the local bunnies before my overnight shift. Y’all hoes wish you had my gentle soul & kind heart

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

@awoodustin Or no one thinks that Orson Wells was a product of his time just like anyone else. His 25 and our 25 are vastly different. Wild to live during one of the only eras where adolescence can be extended but lamenting on how you wish you hit your peak as early as possible.

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

Don’t respond to one (1) text form a ripped dom top and they turn in a high school girlfriend blowing up your phone with passive aggressive shit

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

I have a really cool new coping mechanism where I just repeat “stop being crazy” in my head over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over. Then I’m not crazy!

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

I don’t need medication to function I just go to twitter dot com & read the endless amounts of bitching about how hard living with adhd/depression/ocd is, then my Superiority Complex kicks in. Now I can do laundry

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

I pray to God I don’t ever remember Debbie Reynolds & Carrie Fisher are dead when I’m standing near a cliff

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

Just got my first hickeys @ 29 while blindfolded from a guy working a glory hole all night. He said it’s crazy a guy like me is single. Feeling young, hot, & flirty just before 30

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

I truly believe this country will face a huge wave of progressivism post Trump. Under democrats there was a 1% chance to ever get universal healthcare. Now with Medicaid gutted it will awaken people to how fucked they are, leading to the biggest push for single payer ever. I hope

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

Did you know babies developed their sense of smell in the FIRST TRIMESTER and for months they’re just sniffing the inside of the womb & amniotic fluid. Freaks

[ash @dreamershoteI]

i wish it was socially acceptable to dm someone Hey why did you and your partner break up

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

When you’re on the brink but god takes pity on your meager existence to give you one last treat before the end!!!!!!! A decade of prayers finally answered oh I feel the spirit today

[Pop Crave @PopCrave]

‘The Comeback’ starring Lisa Kudrow renewed for Season 3 at HBO.

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

I literally grew up as a kid who hated music. Would force people to turn off the car radio. Now I have playlists of over 1000+ songs across dozens of genres. Y’all wish you had my growth

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

Realizing all the best moments of my 20s came from ME having a good time, not being a good time for the people around me. Doubling down on my narcissism for my 30s!!!

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

How many marvel movies until there’s a character name “Gork” and they do the stupid meme. I say 4

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

@LEPER_KlNG same but when I take fun drugs me and the voices have the time of our livesssss literally 3 dumb bitches saying exactly in my head over & over

[Dylan @Dylanx63]

Anyone who complains about the binge model of TV is really dumb & lack impulse control. Imagine if you could only read a chapter of a book a week because it creates more “engagement” sounds ridiculous yeah? You literally want less freedom in exchange for…..more twitter memes?