Evan Johnson

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

People who break the ice with “Well what do you know” think it’s such a sick line, I mean just sooo sick

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

I gotta take my anger out on someone and I’m afraid it’s you @PeteButtigieg but how is it 2023 and streetlights are bringing 50 cars to a stop for 0 cars, smells like conspiracy with oil companies to me
https://t.co/TpI05kzRvF

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

I really think it’s just time you go ahead and sign an executive order to put overpasses at all major intersections, I’m just done with streetlights @biden

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

I can’t not say “hell ya brother” whenever I see an alpha chick driving a motorcycle

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

How can you not be romantic about lingerie football #PakistanEconomy

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

#DamarHamlin watching Hines take these kickoffs

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

New Years resolution was to stop making New Years resolutions to drink more water and floss, never gonna happen https://t.co/w1sC61lI1K

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

Was always curious about that non-nutritive cereal varnish, would have loved to get a peek at Clark’s brief summary report #exteriorillumination

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

This just keeps getting better, “I’m not a doctor I never have been” 😂😂😂

[Barstool Sports @barstoolsports]

This Bengals rant is brought to you by the removal of wisdom teeth

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

Incredible comp

[PFT Commenter @PFTCommenter]

Kirk cousins hit the griddy

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

Anyone else do a thorough sweep of your home while wielding a non-battle ready samurai sword after watching a scary movie or is it just me, like I’m talking closets, sheds, inside the dryer the whole 9 #barbarian

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

Seen this tweet appear at least 10 times but she really never gets old

[Fanatics Sportsbook @FanaticsBook]

When you see your blacked out friend reappear after you put them to bed

[tay @skoltay]

Every Vikings fan today 😂 #skol

[kk *is still awake* @kmkrout]

Don’t know what you’re all talking about with a Brendan Fraser “comeback”. We’ve all been watching The Mummy twice a year since 99. The king never left.

[NUFF @nuffsaidny]

Me when I saw King Viserys walking with that little girl. #HouseoftheDragon #HOTD

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

It should be a law for people driving mopeds to have a big smile at all times. Feel like it’s a a good move for a more happy and healthy world

[Justin Russo @justinjrusso]

Tik tok and Instagram: justinjrusso

[Project Hail Gooch @bobgoochman]

when Bill Belichick finds out that a 2nd string senior WR from Murray State is still on the board in the 6th round

[K.O.L.Z @datkolzguy]

"French is much easier to learn that English"

French:

[Evan Johnson @eagle488]

Me trying to sleep after 7 light beers

[kira 👾 @kirawontmiss]

i would rather not get rescued