(the orchard wherein us bask, hand in hand) /. much like plums & pomegranates in the approaching autumn; overly sweet and bird-pecked. our love, too, ripens.
what we had called loving was perhaps my sitting in front of you in a table for two by half-opened window; always serving grapes, cranberries, and my love that had turned succulent on a plate for you.
and also for making me think, for the first time during our time tgt, that i was sorry for ever loving my m. making me feel guilt over the act that’s far from harmful.
its 6 am and i haven’t slept and i keep thinking of when my m’s friend look me with hatred in the first meeting and i keep thinking how m’s friends making m choose between their friendship or me.
i feel resentment towards them ngl. for the way they treated my m badly, crossing the boundaries, and not being respectful. i wish them to break apart. i wish them to hate eo guts. i wish their downfall.
for what it’s worth, for those who have a crush irp because they represent your bias/idol and call it love. and whatever you two have done is only through texts, never on call, never meet eo, never spend an entire day at least with them. it’s not ok? it’s not love.
lol sorry i donT wanna make this like im still not get over it but i had that in me, a bit of grudge against god knows what she put me through and what i put her through. it was conflicted though. but tonight i saw the smile, and i smiled, too.
frankly gonna be the most genuine feeling and honest words. i am really grateful to have my m in my life. it’s the way how i am comforted (by words) and actions, too (which not of many people i have met in my life have ever met that kind of expectation, let alone exceeded it).