Evan Bernstein

Listen to my music👹

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

Waking up this morning, I did not think I would be eating just hummus with just my hands

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

Where did this come from I’ve said ay ay ay 3 times in the past half hour

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

NO I’m getting my tonsils out the day Lana is performing in Boston :(

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

I’m going on a homework frenzy😈

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

I just spent 2 minutes in the bathroom trying to remember why I went only to realize I forgot my toothpaste

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

WHO IS PLAYING TOVE LO IN THE DINING HALL🤤

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

Tripping on pop rocks😍

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

Yuhhhh I heard Banks being played in public for the first time

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

Y’all aren’t ready for me once I start getting good sleep 💪

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

I just did a guided meditation where the background music was the same chords to A House In Nebraska by Ethel Cain and that was all I could think about the whole time

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

I forgot and just looked at the sun directly LMAO

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

Wow my mom’s brave she selected no tip on one of the cashier tablets😭

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

That was so embarrassing my doctor went to give me a handshake and I dapped him up

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

Of course I find my earbuds in my clothes when I’m taking them out of the washer😭

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

It’s the funniest thing when men on gay Tinder have “straight” listed as their sexuality

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

When ADHD starts acting like a disability and not just a silly little quirk😵‍💫

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

I was biting my fingernails and somehow I got fingernails in both my eyes

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

Apparently my friend talked about me in her sociology class today😭

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

I want one of those Regina George shirts with the nipples cut out

[Evan Bernstein @EvanBernstein_]

@CarsonGarrett_ I bought the pillow of you LMAO