Mr. Steal Yo Girl

#thingsbillbrailsfordwouldsay

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

#workprobs

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

Got this new cologne, it’s called maturity. Women can smell it a mile away.

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

You know they call Block Island the Aruba of the North

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

“Meet my friends, excavator and backhoe, I’m bout to turn your face into a construction site” (while holding up fists)

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

Dance? Yeah I like to dance, on the graves of my enemies.

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

Oh that’s what rumblr means!? Let me download it

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

Natures Classroom? That’s the last time I got stung by a bee and it was real bad

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

Do you have pineapple juice in the gun or the can?

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

Idk if it’s me but I always feel letdown when I don’t recognize anyone in the police blotter on the patch

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

Whenever I'm lost I just think wwvdd, what would Vin Diesel do.

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

I get shit done that needs to get done.

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

I'll power wash the side of your face with my fist

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

My friend's say I should do stand-up but I enjoy sitting down too much

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

My Valentine's Day gift from your girl

[BucciOT.Com @Buccigross]

Mike Olt (CHW): 1st player in major-league history to hit a HR for the Cubs and the White Sox in the same season #elias

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

@whitesox @alessi5

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

Best way to move out of the house? Don't move, kick your parents out and claim that shit as your own.

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

Listen I don't watch Glee... It was just the first few seasons

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

My name is BILL, I'm 75% ILL

[Mr. Steal Yo Girl @EvilBillBrails]

Love u bae