FAKE133THOMASPAIN

*Parody account.
Born in Thetford in 1737, as an only child. Fortunately I failed school at 12, and lost my first job too. Now I am a tax officer in London!

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

My job is done with the American Revolution so I think I will head over to France!

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

And a legacy of good writing!

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

If it weren't for my writings, the Americans wouldn't have been inspired enough to win the war. I leave a legacy of motivation, and freedom!

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

Game changer. The British can't take on the Americans and some of the greatest forces in Europe and expect to win.

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

Although Britain seems overpowering, they do not have the heart, the loyalty, and the persistence America hath. America's has technique.

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

BTW @FAKE133JimChalm, nobody reads Plain Truth! What type of a name is Candidus? COMMON SENSE FTW!
#I'mbetteratwritingthan @FAKE133JimChalm

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

Hey @FAKE133JimChalm, if you don't like patriotism why don't you just go back to jolly ol' England with your tea and scones? This is AMERICA

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

"These are the times that try men's souls."

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

FAILED SCHOOL WHEN I WAS 12, YET I STILL WROTE SOME OF THE GREATEST BOOKS IN AMERICAN HISTORY!!!
#WHONEEDSCHOOL?

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

I think freedom is within reach. BTW, If I were you, I would read my super popular book, Common Sense. http://t.co/U4taMFIa

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

The Battle of Lexington looked fun! I wish that I could have shot lobster-backs in orderly lines.
#wishIwasthere

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

Personally I would have took the tea, burned the boat, and then not payed for anything.
#getFake133GeorgeWmad

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

Your saying that we British have bad teeth? Look at yours!

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

See how crazy those colonists are?! They need control!

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

Hey you can't just tar and feather someone and then expect peace! I mean seriously these colonists need some control!
#colonistsbecrazy

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

Hey colonists! Stop killing indians and start paying your dues!

[FAKE133THOMASPAIN @FAKE133THOMASPA]

British people FTW!