Jill Tasei ❤

Comedienne. Mom of dudes & cats. Gamer. Runner. Jeeps! Snowboarder. As seen on NickMom Night Out.

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

2 teenage siblings in Georgia developed an app to help prevent suicide. Let's share the shit out of it and save lives! https://t.co/MlmrequuYw #notok #SuicidePrevention #depression @mariabamfoo @MichaelPhelps @Oprah @RaeRaeBradley @TitusNation @benroy00

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

The internet calls kids crotch goblins, crotch fruit or sex trophies. I am a #lordoftherings fan so I call them my hoohaw halflings. #momofboys #parenting

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

American presidents usually look a lot worse after they serve their term(s). King Charles is starting out rough already, he'll basically be a skeleton at the end of his.

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

@LaTourEiffel has scheduled a meeting during prime touring time. Thousands of people in line 90 minutes after it should have opened. Poor planning 🗼🇫🇷😭

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

Those who can't don't do not teach English.

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

Girls grow their hair down to their waists so they can always wear a hooded cloak.

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

Purgatory - the original fuck around and find out

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

Shortage on baby formula at the same time trying to make abortion illegal? Supply and demand is rigged.

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

I'm now writing cat puns/mom jokes.

What does a cat do after being injured in a cat fight?
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Files a pawsuit

I'm simultaneously sorry and proud.

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

@SouthwestAir please for the love of everything good and wholesome please stop changing my flights.

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

Order of operation is important.
FIRST get laser hair removal done and THEN get tattoos.

#tattoo #tattoos #tattoocare #laserhairremoval #math

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

When @TitusNation asked me how much the nude comedy gig pays me, I missed a golden opportunity to say I do it for the exposure.

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

Been reading about attachment styles - pretty sure mine is instant

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

Omicron is Unicron's older brother, right?

#Omicron #Transformers #covidvariant #unicron

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

@AskPayPal Kuddos to @AskPayPal for fixing this so quickly! I thought for sure I was out the money. Glad I can confidently still use PayPal knowing they will promptly deal with obvious fraud. Thanks Again!

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

Thought I bought a #NightmareBeforeChristmas wreath seller never sent it. Filed claim w/ @PayPal who contacted seller (email, website, order were all failed links from the email=FRAUD). PayPal closed my case bc seller sent them a tracking # for this cheap felt ghost. #rippedoff

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

@AskPayPal I have sent the email and responded to the DM

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

@AskPayPal Sent

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

Adulting: trying to find a way to deal with our traumanalities (personalities that came from our traumas) and find someone with a compatible traumanality.

#adulting #therapy #relationships #trauma

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

I've stopped calling them vegetables. I now call them nocalorieables, they are much easier to eat now.

[Jill Tasei ❤ @FunnyJill]

My #liftinggoals:
Be strong enough to make son's bed every day. #weightedblanket

#momofboys #parenting #chores