Funny And Fact

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

How to get a woman mad in 2 steps: 1) Take a picture of her. 2) Don't show it to her.

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

Dating tip #101: throw pebbles at her window to get her attention.
if that doesn’t work, move straight to bowling balls

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

how did you go from cute to annoying so fast?

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

I'm shy at first but.. I do the stupidest random things when I get comfortable with someone.

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

Dear YouTube, Please stop making me watch a 30 second advertisement just to watch a two minute video. Sincerely, it isn't worth it..

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

*Hears laughter from 49262 miles away*

Me: I know they're laughing at me I just know it.

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

Sex makes women pretty, While having sex- the body doubles on estrogen levels.. which makes hair shine & the skin becomes softer.

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

You want to see a perfect relationship? Watch a movie...

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

If someone says "I love you" and you don't feel the same way, just say "I love YouTube" really fast..

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

if you’re going to insult me please give me 24 hours notice so i can act like i care.

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

I love sleeping, but I never want to go to bed early..

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

They say money cant buy happiness... RT if you'd be happy with 27 Million Dollars.

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

Your lips are like wine & I wanna get drunk.

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

I tend to say "I don't know" when I don't feel like thinking.

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

A relationship with no arguments, is a relationship with a lot of secrets.

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

During school: "What day is it?" "Monday January 13th, 2013 11:58 Eastern Standard time".

Summer: "What day is it?" "Probably June".

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

"Dude I have to tell you something really funny!"
*Adult walks into room*
"..... I'll tell you in a minute.

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

By the time you finish saying, "I love you" to someone- 20,000 cells in your body will die & be replaced with new cells.

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

9 months before I was born, I went to a party with my dad, and left with my mom.

[Funny And Fact @FunnynFact]

Twitter was sold in 2006 for $5 million & is now worth $10 billion.