FuzzyMomBrain

Chronicling the mundane, everyday, scary, ridiculous, funny, & sleep-deprived mommy thoughts

[MyMomologue @MyMomologue]

Daily Routine:

7am: Today is going to be a great day!

9am: We're a little off plan, but we can still have a good day.

11am: This is fine. Everything's fine.

1pm: Today is a shit show!

3pm: *drinking*

5pm: WTF, now I have to make dinner?!

7pm: *just dazed and shouting*

[Aaron Brackett @Aaron_Brackett]

Here is the video from our storm tracking unit as the tornado rolled over the Riverwind Casino.

[FuzzyMomBrain @FuzzyMomBrain]

Who was Gerry and what did he rig??? #deepthoughts

[FuzzyMomBrain @FuzzyMomBrain]

When your toddler sleeps in past 10am

[FuzzyMomBrain @FuzzyMomBrain]

My 19mo old slept in til 10 today #isthisreallife #myhappydance

[Ash (an female) ⚪️ @adult_mom]

Being an adult is great for people who like to drink 32 ounces of coffee and still feel tired all the time

[FuzzyMomBrain @FuzzyMomBrain]

Toddler has been up for 2 hrs...I've sat down and gotten up approximately 120x

[FuzzyMomBrain @FuzzyMomBrain]

The dried up hot pink play dough on my carpet, walls, and fireplace really accents the toddlerhood in my home...

[FuzzyMomBrain @FuzzyMomBrain]

Logistics of Getting into a Storm Shelter https://t.co/7NrvRfjMAZ

[James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn @XplodingUnicorn]

You haven’t seen true anger until you’ve watched a toddler trying to carry three things with two hands.

[Ash (an female) ⚪️ @adult_mom]

I am the most dedicated gym person I know who comes exclusively for the childcare.

[Ash (an female) ⚪️ @adult_mom]

I turned off the TV today and made my kids play board games like it was 1955 and now I know why all of our grandparents were alcoholics

[FuzzyMomBrain @FuzzyMomBrain]

Read somewhere that a #toddler can accomplish more in 1 #unsupervised minute than most ppl can all day. I believe that is the absolute truth

[Ash (an female) ⚪️ @adult_mom]

How many meals comprised of cereal can I feed my kids in one week before it's considered child neglect?

[FuzzyMomBrain @FuzzyMomBrain]

A parent's magic trick :: waking baby from nap without entering their room

*starts doing something productful*

"Wahhhhhhhhh"

[FuzzyMomBrain @FuzzyMomBrain]

90% of my hangars are plastic vs. wire so I'm almost a #grownup #adulting #goals #almostthere #adultingwin

[❤️‍🔥Sardonic Tart❤️‍🔥 @SardonicTart]

"You can't handle the truth!"

- My mirror first thing in the morning

[FuzzyMomBrain @FuzzyMomBrain]

Shows I didn't care about 15 months ago that I now wake up to:
@BobtheBuilder at 6am
@ReadyJetGoPBS at 630am
#momlife #momproblems #boymom

[Ash (an female) ⚪️ @adult_mom]

And on the 7th day God rested, but the children did not rest. So on Monday God made school and He sent the kids and all the people rejoiced.

[FuzzyMomBrain @FuzzyMomBrain]

Ok, done w fried food infomercials onto @CountryHeatDnce I'm getting mixed messages, hubby wants both the fryer and country heat now