gerard

#BLM Twitter gave me terminal brain damage

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@radiocollides @bussywipes @jessicaray0 Your right to a living 5-year old does not preclude my right to drive my 4 ton death machine 50 mph through residential streets

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@elonmusk bitch

[senatormeow.bsky.social @SenatorMeow]

finally

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

Literally me

[ppigg @s4m31p4n]

Me on a first date: baby you my everything

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@LeslieWeegee @TrumpEraLibMeme @ObamaEraCons I really hope discovery Warner suspends your shitty Cartoon Network account. No way they’d want someone who supports chattel slavery to be running it. Also Texas can’t even manage a power grid let alone an entire republic. Delusional motherfucker

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@LeslieWeegee @TrumpEraLibMeme @ObamaEraCons

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@SethLargo @PaulSkallas Can’t believe there was real life inspiration for the Breath of the Wild glider

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@JiSeokSeo2 @s4m31p4n You won’t see the pearly gates

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@Skrrt__Vonnegut Filthy Franklin packing the court with his alter egos and making Pink Guy Chief Justice.

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@GREGORYABUTLER @ryanlcooper Hell nah your Ubers are like $150. Pure insanity

[Klaus Flouride @Brians_webpage1]

yea… i’d go here

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@TheReal_BLamb Guy getting a loan in 2012 for a new restaurant: “Yeah, sure there might be less than 500 people in this town but that just means less competition, right? I guarantee you, Jack this place is gonna put us on the map or my name isn’t Slim of the Spring Valley.”

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

“Today I spoke with the Mac and Cheese people about how fat of a check they’re going to write me. We talked about how many karats my ice cream cone chain will be. I left truly inspired by all the muhfukin 0’s in my bank account.”

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@UDHCMH The Hatman is finally getting married :,)

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@MajestyRia @Ichiryu_Rising @godestvogue @Aye_Ash101 “Do your own research” on why Kanye is justified saying that shit? Oh man we got a REAL cock gobbler amongst us

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@sane_less @PunishedChode @BadTweetCharlie @JUNlPER @scrowder Libs call them “trousers” we call them twat pants

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@BlakeFelix5 @Cthulu_Goat @WhackNicholson Idk what you’re trying to say but it sounds incomprehensible like the board so you’ve probably got the right idea

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@BadTweetCharlie @JUNlPER @scrowder Fortunately two of those websites aren’t worth having any friends on

[gerard @GerardtheGuard]

@ReturnOfSloth @PaulSkallas It ain’t a real sport if your star athlete doesn’t die from CTE at age 46