𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ

𝘠𝘦𝘴, 𝘔𝘴. 𝘔𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥— 𝘐'𝘷𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘣𝘦𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨.
(ᴇxᴄᴇꜱꜱɪᴠᴇ ɢɪʀʟᴄᴏᴄᴋ ʙᴇʏᴏɴᴅ ᴛʜɪꜱ ᴘᴏɪɴᴛ!)

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

ㅤ
ㅤ 𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀
ㅤ 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐘'𝐒 #𝟏 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋𝐅𝐀𝐈𝐋𝐔𝐑𝐄
ㅤ ☆ ☆ ☆

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

oh my god

[HYPEX @HYPEX]

NEW SUMMER HELSIE SKIN

[Fortnite @Fortnite]

@yamameta mommy

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

If Esme's always so peppy and happy, and Ennui's always sad and heartbroken— Why don't they just make out already?

I think that would probably make both of them a little bit more normal. Probably. Maybe.

...I'm filming it either way—

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

Can't believe I have to spend my entire weekend doing "security awareness training" just because I opened one or two Y-Labs phishing emails.

How was I supposed to know that a link titled "NEW Lexa Unit - Carnal Edition" was a scam...? 💧

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

Great. Because I really needed a 𝘀𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗱 tattooed, psychopathic gunsmith with twin braids in my life.

Please have a simpler coffee order than Jules' twenty page latte...💧

[Shiina @ShiinaBR]

ARCANE SKINS ARE RETURNING IN CHAPTER 7

(via @HYPEX)

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

I haven't gotten an alt in a while, but it could be worse— Like, I could be stuck in Save The World!

I guess Penny shows cleavage there though, so it's not all bad.

[Fortnite @Fortnite]

Solo? Never.
Fortnite Sidekicks.
Launching in the Battle Pass Nov 1 🐾 https://t.co/Iv2lOOSXhP

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

So 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁'𝘀 why there was a leash and collar on my bed yesterday...

I didn't think it was for anything else, I was just uhm— Yeah, obviously for pets!

[Martenno | Soda Pop Bot @Martenno_Tweets]

Private Research Pending | What are they plotting?
SAC: SodaPopBot #Marigold #Midas #FortniteArt

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

I've pulled the "oops, I fell asleep on the Battle Bus and '𝘼𝘾𝘾𝙄𝘿𝙀𝙉𝙏𝘼𝙇𝙇𝙔' slumped over onto your boobs" move like, three times this week— And I've only been slapped once! ✨

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

She's missing something, but I just can't put my finger on it... Maybe like, something blonde? And with pink and blue highlights?

Oh, and both her and that mysterious missing thing need to play seven minutes in heaven with me.

[HYPEX @HYPEX]

WEDNESDAY ADDAMS (Jenna Ortega)

[FNBRintel @FNBRintel]

The "Mother of rose toys" tweet from the @DojaCat Fortnite takeover has now been deleted.

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

How do I formally remind my boss that dealing with vampirism isn't in my internship contract...?

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

I've literally only seen Helsie cast "Spell that makes Joni fingerblast herself".

...Some people really don't deserve magic n' stuff.

[HYPEX @HYPEX]

UPCOMING FORTNITEMARES PACK REMIX

I CAN ALSO CONFIRM THIS ✅

It was leaked by Fortnite LEGO this update, spotted by @blortzen, @itsmeleaky & @Wensoing

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

Oh no.

[HYPEX @HYPEX]

ANOTHER CONFIRMED FORTNITEMARES SKIN

[Spotted by @blortzen]

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

I just fell to my knees in the Durr Burger parking lot.

[Fort Byte News @FortByteNews]

Gooning has been vaulted in Fortnite ❌

Players can no longer use Emotes when a nearby player is using the Party Hips or Poki Emotes, likely to prevent less-than-family-friendly Emote combinations in modes like Party Royale. Epic Games has not commented on the matter.

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

I keep hearing rumors about Rainbow Royale being cancelled this year, but that's not the case—

It's just going to be held in my room instead, and it's going to be 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘢 𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘢𝘸𝘬𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥!🌈

[𝙎𝙆𝙔𝙀.ᐟ @GIRLFAILURESKYE]

// Epic please give The Machinist an actual name so that my posts stop sounding so fucking weird. 🙏

Every time I have to refer to her as "The Machinist" and everyone else by their first names, I lose a little bit of sanity.