K Halcrow (I'm in disguise)

Accountant in training, attention span of a kitten, holder of enough random knowledge to win a pub quiz singlehandedly, but zero useful info.

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@BandQ @BandQ the list of issues is so long an email would probably be better. Surprised the response was so quick, our experience from the building and q store had nothing so proactive.

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

"Gf just bought and had kitchen installed by @BandQ ZERO STARS DO NOT RECOMEND! poor workmanship, no accountability "dont blame us is our suppliers/contractors fault" "oh, you wants working appliances? Well, you need to rearrange your days off to fit our schedule"

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

"All you need to do is take 1 day off for delivery and we will handle the rest" my arse! Any other company sells you something for 10k and they appreciate you as a customer, @BandQ get your money and expect you to bend over backwards to accommodate them!

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

"what, you expect the flooring to be done properly? Oh, thats our subcontractors fault" after paying 10 grand, having to take 10 days of holidays to accommodate deliveries THAT NEVER TURNED UP! Given £300 to hire our own contractors and £300 for our trouble.

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@fesshole Took a picture of myself at my desk, used it as my background, and wandered around the building, trying to see how many other attendees cameras I could appear on before anyone noticed. Goes to show how much I normally contribute to meetings and how few people pay attention to me

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@CarolineGourlay @SoVeryBritish Yup, had that with an all day breakfast onky available before half past 11. Turns out it's available all day, as long as they have any left overseas from the morning

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@anon_opin The phrase I dont like is "won a penalty" as if you have somehow achieved something remarkable. Perhaps they should change the name to something like "won an oscar" to reflect what really happened. Or "chickened out of taking a shot because someone was too close"

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@bushontheradio Dignitas express?

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@thehandofbeadle Was queuing up in a local shop to buy my lunch. The old lady in front of me said, "You go before me, I've got plenty of time". I honestly don't think she did! Her 11s were up, not a good sign. I nearly warned her not to buy green bananas just in case!

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@ADHDForReal

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@dodgson_sally Mine usually last about 15 mins. Sit back, watch the pretty colours and wait it out. That's my usual tactic 🙈

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@Poppy_yyyyyyyy Put it on marketplace as buyer to dismantle. When they come to take it away and asl where it is, tell them they took it away as per the original agreement once it was no longer required

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

Using AI to rewrite part of my presentation in the style of Kafka and add a couple of jokes (just for shits and giggles) this is what it added at the end.....

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@briggityboppity Is he a man or a muppet? (Or a manly muppet)

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@adeleparks Yes

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@Sarah_Haar_ Hope. you didnt point out that pineapples don't grow on trees either 🙈

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@ATRightMovies Ice cold in alex
A town called Alice
Clerks

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@anon_opin We have 1 person in our organisation who f@cks up her monthly expenses so spectacularly and creatively, yet differently, every single month, I can't work out if she is a genius or an idiot. I locked every non input cell of the form, so she printed and posted it! Was still wrong!

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@timoldland @michael___wave Getting my lunch at a shop in my lunch hour. Old lady before me said, "You go ahead of me, I've got plenty of time" didnt have the heart to tell her I didn't think she did. Her 11s were up. Not a good sign.

[K Halcrow (I'm in disguise) @halcrow1]

@gingy3848 @Em_E_Dee Knitted jumper in local dialect