Haley Parker

If you're reading this, I hope you're Johnny Depp.

[Haley Parker @haypar]

@drinkaha what’s up with the orange + grapefruit flavor? The latest box all cans had no flavor tasted like club soda. Tried to reach out through the website but kept getting an error.

[Haley Parker @haypar]

@Chobani adding new ingredients to their flips 🤮 wasn’t trying to get that extra bug protein.

[Haley Parker @haypar]

@AskRobinhood where is my money? My account is not showing any of my stocks? Are y’all hacked, having issues?

[Haley Parker @haypar]

@winterswiftie89 So the ones released 3, 5, and 6 correspond to speak now, 1989, and reputation lyrics, respectively, right? That’s what I’m thinking.

[Haley Parker @haypar]

@TMFanSupport why can’t I access the site for the presale? It’s only taking me to a count down to capital one.

[Haley Parker @haypar]

@Ticketmaster So what are y’all going to do about availability people who had tickets in their carts and you kicked out?? For today?

[Haley Parker @haypar]

@TMFanSupport I had tickets in my cart and pressed pay now and it kicked me out to the beginning of the queue with 2000+ in front of me. I have missed my great seats.

[Haley Parker @haypar]

@Ticketmaster i had tickets in my cart and pressed pay now and you kicked to me to the beginning of the queue for @taylorswift13 eras tour! I cannot stand you @Ticketmaster

[Haley Parker @haypar]

SIGN UP FOR A SHOT AT $10,000 https://t.co/5dMkfOxgsp

[Haley Parker @haypar]

Hey @thrillist check out this app that pays you to drink beer

[Haley Parker @haypar]

@rgwheeler1109 Cocoa forte. Check it out 😛

[Haley Parker @haypar]

Eclipse 2017 #disappointed 🌘

[Haley Parker @haypar]

Driving home today, I blacked out. When I came to, I was swiping my card for $100 worth of clothing items in Target.

[Haley Parker @haypar]

Me: why don't my parents treat me like an adult. Also me: lying on the couch in my pjs at 2pm screaming for my mom to bring me cookies.

[Haley Parker @haypar]

@jayvora87 This is actually 100% accurate

[Haley Parker @haypar]

Not sure why I think if I whisper "Chloe look!" and hide every time I see a bird on my porch that Chloe will understand 😑

[Haley Parker @haypar]

My prime now driver is currently delivering near Davis Drive, @jayvora87 is it you?

[Haley Parker @haypar]

@jayvora87 Let me set aside an hour for them

[Haley Parker @haypar]

You better be on that food truck Twitter tonight, so I know what I'm eating tomorrow @jayvora87

[Haley Parker @haypar]

@piepushers @SFFDurham I mean come on.... @jayvora87