Noble Nazgul [57821]

someone get me a squatty potty

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

*In the year 2051*

Grandkids: tell us again how the world ended grandpa.

Me: *flicks fidget spinner* it all started...

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

@hasanthehun Looks to me like they’re protecting an incredibly important person.

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

@goddammitsarah Oh man I know everything about that.

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

@mostly_bravo @ryanne_shay @Andrew_Powers_ @TRyanGregory I prefer anti-choice

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

@summerxiris Good morning!

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

What’s another name for thesaurus?

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

@LeftAtLondon Ah man, I didn’t even know he was sick

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

@bethesda Got receipts?

[jenny “coppertop” 🥢 @jlynn43xo]

Why are there pop tarts but no mom tarts

Because of the pastryarchy

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

@mosseri I don’t like it at all. My feed just seems to be videos now. I use instagram for pictures

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

I’ve spent most if the pandemic clothed in anxiety and sweatpants

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

Kanye: imma let you finish…

Will Smith: hold my beer!

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

@TetrisMobile what happened to master goals? I haven’t had one in a few days?

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

@lorelysecret 😉

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

The fuckin whip shit of all fuckin shitter bongers.

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

Please read my new blog post, ‘I became a Marxist and lost 10 lbs in two weeks.’

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

@StokeNewton @DoesRattem @Xarenoss1 @brycetache It is a race issue.

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

@StokeNewton @DoesRattem @Xarenoss1 @brycetache 1 out of every thousand black males are killed by the police.

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

@IwriteOK Company towns worked so well in the past

[Noble Nazgul [57821] @HolyWaterFire]

Math didn’t protect him.

[Gabriel Elizondo @elizondogabriel]

NEW YORK CITY: Andrew Yang, mayoral candidate, announces he has tested positive for COVID-19. Says he has mild symptoms.