Sara Lang

I dreamt about 18 hard boiled eggs

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

Went shopping after work! More specifically, I carried one pair of earrings around Nordstrom Rack for 45 minutes then put them back and went home

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

I’ll be back for another tweet in six months

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

My Uber driver farted but he immediately cracked a window which was very cool of him

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

@hoCHIEF This hurts but it’s true

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

@ChapstickGod69 This is my shit!!

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

Big s/o to this Tulsi Gabbard billboard that’s brought me peace and consistency on my drives between Chicago and Omaha since early 2019

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

I’m suddenly a Garth Brooks stan?

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

Being an adult rocks because I can do whatever I want. Example: for dinner I had a bowl of grape nuts, a bowl of peas, and a slice of bread (help)

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

Made a phone call to Triple A today that's been giving me anxiety since September. Took 5 minutes to resolve the issue and if that ain't millennial culture idk what is

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

Late to the party but we still appreciate you, Nevada!!

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

RELIEF

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

@ClairelyNoOne This can’t be true. How

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

Made sense on drugs

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

Nonstick pans are the same as matte nail polish

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

Going to be very hard for me post-quarantine to make plans with someone and not send a zoom invite

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

Send prayers, I lost* my good friend** today :(

*threw away
**old, disgusting, go-to nude bra

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

Are we in the Bad Place

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

My dad just looked at me and said “Tomorrow’s Wine Wednesday” as if no one’s ever thought of it before

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

Am now addicted to The Biggest Loser thanks quarantine

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

@YoSoySexxy Am truly deceased over this

[Sara Lang @iamslang]

Remember when we were all like “March Madness might not allow fans in the arena?? 😮😮” and now we’re like “you went OUTSIDE?? 😵😵😵”