🇺🇸 Donald Trump: "I knew Michael Jackson very well, and he was a special guy. He spent a lot of time with my kids Donald and Eric."
"He just loved children genuinely, he was never a child molester."
🚨 JUST IN: The bodycam footage of Karmelo Anthony's arrest following him MURDERING Austin Metcalf has officially been released
Karmelo at NO POINT showed remorse. He blamed the VICTIM, of course.
Thank God he's going to rot in prison now.
NO MERCY.
BREAKING - Footage of Karmelo Anthony stabbing Austin Metcalf has been released, and it shows Karmelo reaching into his bag, pulling out a knife, walking under the tent, and then running away after stabbing Metcalf, completely undermining claims that he acted in “self-defense.”
🔥🤣 THE SCOTTISH ARE DRINKING ALL THE BEER IN BOSTON LOL
“We have never seen anything like it. The White Bull Tavern… they drank the place dry… all that was left was BUDLIGHT” - Bar Managers
Even the Scots won’t drink Bud Light. It’s true they are assimilating to America perfectly.
If you’re visiting for a very large sporting event & you happen to discover RANCH while you’re here… pls pack it in your CHECKED BAG on the way home.
Thank you.
The World Cup has turned America into a discovery channel for the rest of the world.
And they are not handling it well.
In the best possible way.
Here is what they are discovering:
Free public restrooms. Europeans pay every time.
Free water at every restaurant. Just appears.
Free refills. Coffee. Sodas. Iced tea. Unlimited.
Free chips and salsa before you even order.
Free warm bread with dinner.
Ice in drinks like civilized people.
Air conditioning everywhere. Not a moral debate. A fact.
Parking lots attached to the actual place you are going.
Drive throughs where the food comes to the car while you sit in it.
Ranch dressing by the gallon.
Tex-Mex that cannot be explained only experienced.
Dental care that actually works.
Buccee’s. There are no words for Buccee’s.
Then they found the grocery stores.
Five of them within one mile.
Each one the size of an aircraft hangar.
Burgers. Steaks. Brisket. Ribs. Pulled pork. Lamb. Veal. Every cut of every animal ever domesticated by human civilization available in one refrigerated aisle at ten in the morning on a Tuesday.
The Germans stood in the meat section for forty five minutes.
In silence.
Processing.
They finally understand why we do not have trains.
We have roads wide enough for the cars we actually drive.
Parking lots the size of small European countries.
Airports in every city worth visiting.
Why would we need trains.
The Germans are taking ranch home by the bottle.
The Dutch found queso and briefly lost the ability to speak.
The Japanese are photographing HEB like it is the Louvre.
The Czechs are weeping in West, Texas.
Welcome to America.
Everything is free, enormous, air conditioned, comes with chips, and has five grocery stores within a mile that will sell you any cut of any animal you have ever imagined.
Write that down. 🦋
🚨 BREAKING: Cristiano Ronaldo’s sister, Katia Aveiro, has shared a cryptic message on Instagram following Portugal’s latest World Cup match.
“Magically, they forgot how to pass, win the ball back, and launch counter-attacks. The game became all about passing backwards in midfield.
Strange World Cup. Very strange.” 🇵🇹
If there’s one thing I blame Cristiano Ronaldo for, it’s changing his personality.
I miss the arrogant, ruthless, selfish Ronaldo… the one who demanded the spotlight and imposed his presence on everyone, whether they liked it or not.
This softer version built on affection, love, and trying to please everyone doesn’t work with this generation.
Sometimes greatness needs ego, and the villain aura is exactly what makes people follow.
Cristiano Ronaldo didn’t carry this country on his head for 20+ yrs for a player like Joao Neves(a 21yrs old) saying the greatest player your country will ever see and the GOAT is just like “everyone in the squad”
I miss when Pepe and the likes of Quaresma were in the team!!! They should go and ask Nani