Flute Newton

those / it

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

Inside you are two wolves. They are in a trench coat, trying to get into an R-rated film.

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

@johnmoe @stouffers Do you have a Vitamix?

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

@marlaschnelder Ew, turkey jerky

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

I never supported Wilbury travel. Wilburys were meant to stay in place, and I still think that.

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

A porn parody of The Punisher called The Peniser. That's…that's all I got tonight

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

@CaytonHolland I don't know if you still do the Sbarro joke but it's fucking dead now

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

The year is 11,406. God Emperor Carter, now an enormous peanut, calls the great houses to Georgiakkia.

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

@Vernacularshift Lymph

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

JD Vance seems like he's ready for this to all be over so he can get back to writing that album.

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

@FrankConniff Vaingloriouos Ozempiclod it is, then

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

@KyleClark I was drrunk at 4

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

Yeah but VJ Dance would be a sweet name for a 90s CD-ROM game.

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

In the pandemic: that smiling Turkish TikTok chef making mountains of food without breaking eye contact…that's who got to Eric Adams.

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

The indictment is going to reveal that Eric Adams is The Batman.

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

Them, 1992: "Don't sweat the technique."
Me, 2024: "… FUCK"

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

Just thinking ahead for a quick (but satisfying!) mid-week dinner?

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

In Soviet Russia, pets eat YOU

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

If Trump wins the election, Cold Slither will replace Kendrick at the half time show.

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

@AdamTheNix You and Nathan Lund have never looked better.

[Flute Newton @InfiniteChicken]

@KyleClark Fun fact: hops grown in Colorado tend to contain more Caryophyllene due to increased UV exposure, and this can result in a phenol uptake at about 20 mol/dm3 per every 16 liters of hey I'm just making this up, those look great.