Akanksha Priyadarshini

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[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

It took me 20 years of people-pleasing to understand this, and I'll say it in 30 seconds (from someone who finally stopped).

1. When you spend a lifetime making others happy, you end up a stranger to yourself.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

Notice how people treat you when you have nothing to offer.

Because being needed feels like being loved.

So you stay helpful. First to show up, last to ask for anything.

Until the day you can't.

And the room goes quiet in a way that finally tells you everything.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

Nothing bad happened.

That's what made it so hard to name.

There was roof over your head.
Food on the table.
Parents who worked hard.

But no one asked how you were doing.

No version of you that wasn't managed or fixed.

You grew up fine. And you grew up empty.

The doubt that it counts?

That's not humility. That's the wound.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

Healing is the most misunderstood thing you can do.

You do not need a dramatic story to justify the wound.

You do not need anyone to agree it was hard.

You do not need to have forgiven anyone yet.

One honest moment, felt all the way through, without reaching for a reason to dismiss it.

That's all healing ever asks of you.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

Safe relationships aren't the ones without conflict.

They're the ones where the fight happens and you both repair.

Most people don't have that.

They have silence that looks like peace.

Agreements that look like compatibility.

You cannot build closeness without discomfort.

You can only build distance that feels safe enough to stay in forever.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

I stopped explaining myself a long time ago.

I don't want to justify every boundary I set.

To make my needs small enough to be accepted.

To earn the right to make my own decisions.

I want to say no once and trust it.

To need what I need without building a case.

To be around people who don’t require my reasons to respect me.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

@Zilot042 Worry looks ahead, but gratitude brings us back to the present. When we make space for both, it's easier to move forward with a little more peace and a lot more hope.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

@Lilly7862 Everyone’s journey runs on a different timeline. Just because someone is ahead today doesn’t mean you’re behind. Keep planting, keep growing.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

@thejustinwelsh Exactly. The hard part is figuring out what you want, not what looks good to others.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

You watched your parents' face the moment they walked in the door.

Their mood decided whether you were safe that day.

So you got good at managing it.

Anticipating it. Disappearing into it.

Now you do it without the door.

Without the parent. Without the danger.

In offices. In friendships. In relationships you keep almost leaving.

The harder question is how do you stop.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

@bluewmist Growth isn't a breakthrough moment. It's a series of uncomfortable realizations that force you to change, whether you're ready or not.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

@thought_harbor The middle is where most people quit but it's also where character is built. The outcome gets the attention, but the process is what makes it possible.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

@wealth_director That's true. Most meaningful progress happens in the ordinary moments. Showing up, doing the work and staying consistent long after the excitement fades.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

You had something to say. You still haven't said it.

You keep rehearsing the words instead.

The safe version. The soft version.

The one nobody can misunderstand.

But there’s no version that guarantees a good reaction.

Not perfect delivery. Not careful timing.

Not the kindest possible phrasing.

You only control one thing. Whether you were honest.

Speak. Let them handle the rest.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

There's a difference between entitlement and believing you're capable of more.

The world mistakes being humble with settling.

Wanting a better life, bigger goals, or higher standards doesn't make you too much.

It just means you haven't stopped growing.

[Dr. Julie Gurner @drgurner]

"Every single thing you do is based on what you think you deserve. " - J. Moore

The world will always try to knock you down a few notches...tell you to be "humble," "don't be greedy," "you expect too much."

But maybe you deserve more than where you're at.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

@drgurner There's a difference between entitlement and believing you're capable of more. Sometimes being humble gets confused with settling.

Wanting a better life, bigger goals, or higher standards doesn't make you too much. It just means you haven't stopped growing.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

Safe relationships aren't the ones without conflict.

They're the ones where the fight happens and you both repair.

Most people don't have that.

They have silence that looks like peace.

Agreements that look like compatibility.

You cannot build closeness without discomfort.

You can only build distance that feels safe enough to stay in forever.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

When someone I love goes quiet, I don't ask what's wrong.

I start fixing things they didn't ask me to fix.

But I’m learning to pause.

Because fixing their mood is about me feeling safe around their emotions.

Not about supporting them.

They’re allowed to feel what they feel.

And I’m allowed to remember:

Their discomfort is not my danger.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

The internet praises hyper-independence like it's a strength.

It's almost always a wound:

- I stopped asking because no one came
- I kept showing up to feel useful enough to be loved
- I grew up being "the strong one" — silence was just easier

Don't let someone's "I don't need anyone" post make you feel weak for wanting connection.

You don’t have to choose between independence and being held.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

The family that made you anxious now calls you distant.

They don't see the phone calls you dreaded for days.

The comments you swallowed for years.

The moments you just wanted to be seen.

You didn't go distant.

You went safe.

[Akanksha Priyadarshini @itsAkankxa]

I used to think rest would fix the burnout.

Take the weekend off. Sleep more. Do less.

It didn't work.

Because I wasn't just tired from doing too much.

I was tired from being someone else.

The version that holds it together.

Stays calm. Doesn't need much.

That version has to be built every morning before the day has asked anything of you.

Rest doesn't touch that kind of tired.