Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome

Im not a horse so dont ask

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

@JonSwearingen All I can say is woah

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

This Lion Forest golfer guy seems like a pretty big deal #bucksin6

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

I had a dream that I was playing cards against humanity and everyone played "Ruth Bader Ginsburg" in regards to someone we want to bang

I'm not sure what's more depressing, repressed sexual thoughts about RBG or the fact that I cant dream more exciting games to play with friends

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

@buddyhield is the kind of guy anybody in the league can love. Im on the Buddytrain after this season. He's got the right kinda talk and walk. #dawg #pleaseletthebullsgetclosefriend

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

Ahhhh, my favorite point of any new job or relationship has come for me.

The day my collagues ask themselves "Is this guy smart or is he retarded?"

#spoilers #itsboth

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

@nlg2013

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

@nlg2013 Mostly because at a high level, theres not much to like about college basketball. I like a little ra ra myself, but thats about all there is to quality of the game

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

Dad interactions are....... well dad interactions

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

I guess I'm going to have a hard time pooping tomorrow because facebooks been hitting me with multiple laxetive ads #future

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

Once a year I hear someone pronounce meme "may-may" and everytime, it feels really good to definitively not be the dumbest person in the room #its2019

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

I listened to a whole @AvrilLavigne album. And I genuinely enjoyed it. Im not proud, but it happened. So here we are #sk8erboi

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

Theres a @TMobile conference at the hotel I'm staying at. I'm trying to inform them how dope their CEO is and they aren't grasping the awesomeness. Almost switched to tmobile too #smdh

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

Convo from today meeting my friends girlfriend

Me-"How'd you meet?"

"Oh we met online"

"What site?"

"*straight face* https://t.co/3ARSdBs9iK"

Marry this girl friend #tooaccurateforjokes #davidsinbred

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

Real talk.

At my grandma's house and I saw a Kenny G album. I only ironically know who he is but know some of his songs so I asked for the cd. Direct response from my GRANDMOTHER

"It makes sense you would ask for that your grandfather used to make the best love to this" #nope

[John Legere @JohnLegere]

The greedy old Carriers had plans to steal wireless

But the team in magenta was determined and tireless

So sit back and listen, grab a friend, the more the merrier

It’s a classic holiday tale with a twist, from the Un-carrier

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

You can put a fence around a pig but that doesn't mean you've got a petting zoo bucko. #knowhatimsayin

[Doug Dimmadome Owner of the Dimsdale Dimmadome @J_Hoff17]

Its hard to explain to anyone over 40 that when I say, "I don't want to be here" that i don't mean with them or where I'm physically at

I mean like alive or on the planet