Jackie Martling

dial (516) 922-WINE !

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

Oct 24 @CatchPrinceton * great jokes! drinks! great food! cute waitresses! * BYO condoms * pay bucks get yuks * jokes that make whores blush * clean underwear suggested * free bathrooms * post-show French-kiss lessons * most seats face the stage * laughs! https://t.co/DqhgD6zcJ4

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

sitting in with Bran Ferren, a brilliant & great guy with a beyond staggering media track record. decades ago he was the head of Disney Imagineering and has since explored countless creatively scientific avenues .. a true Renaissance man. why's he with me?
https://t.co/XV7hOvoZBm

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

come laugh your ass off * leave with an arsenal of jokes, use them to hoodwink people you meet into thinking you have personality * breast size not an issue except for the women * pot smokers, you know damn well who you is * (516) 922-WINE ! * Hoof Hearted? Ice Melted. * diarrhea

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

8pm Saturday, Oct 24th @CatchPrinceton 102 Carnegie Center, Princeton NJ * wanna make 5 lbs. fat pretty? put a nipple on it * sperm: "Did we just pass her tonsils?" @Matt_Nappo @MarkSimoneNY @OpieRadio @GoToWhitney @Q1043 @friarsclub https://t.co/DqhgD6zKyC

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

more fun than two barrels of snot! unique, terrific gifts for any occasion! insult a relative, send filthy jokes, show your love! a personalized video they keep forever! and I make money! *wheee!* @OpieRadio @1023WBAB @MarkSimoneNY @Q1043 @UNCLEVINNIESCC https://t.co/eqZDXeNJlS

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

more fun than a two barrels of snot! unique, terrific gifts for any occasion! insult a relative, send filthy jokes, show your love! a personalized video they keep forever! and I make money! *wheee!* @OpieRadio @1023WBAB @MarkSimoneNY @Q1043 @UNCLEVINNIESCC https://t.co/eqZDXeNbwk

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

a thumbtack is a dime with a hard-on * how many calories are there in cunnilingus? it depends which direction she wipes * (516) 922-WINE!

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

8pm Saturday, Oct 24th @CatchPrinceton 102 Carnegie Center, Princeton NJ * wanna make 5 lbs. fat pretty? put a nipple on it * sperm: "Did we just pass her tonsils?" @Matt_Nappo @MarkSimoneNY @OpieRadio @GoToWhitney @Q1043 @friarsclub https://t.co/DqhgD6zKyC

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

8pm Saturday, Oct 24th @CatchPrinceton 102 Carnegie Center, Princeton NJ * wanna make 5 lbs. fat pretty? put a nipple on it * sperm: "Did we just pass her tonsils?" @Matt_Nappo @MarkSimoneNY @OpieRadio @GoToWhitney @Q1043 @friarsclub https://t.co/DqhgD6zKyC

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

8pm Saturday, Oct. 24th @CatchPrinceton 102 Carnegie Center, Princeton, NJ * topless encouraged, especially the babes * a fart's a turd honking for the right-of-way * @GoToWhitney @friarsclub @PrincetonFTBL @Q1043 @MarkSimoneNY @Matt_Nappo @SiriusXMComedy https://t.co/DqhgD6zKyC

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

@sarrah_bellus @JohnCleese intelligence

[The Hollywood Reporter @THR]

'Kill Me Now' Review: A Tired Hollywood Suspense Satire Riddled with Borscht Belt Humor https://t.co/aG2N60a9TY

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

"The Off Hour Rockers" * always fun & occasionally in tune * that's our bright yellow 1955 Cadillac Hearse, "Tweety" * on a break at The Right Track Inn in 1974 I counted 18 of us smoking pot in this funmobile * "Roll up the reefer, we'll have some illegal fun .." (516) 922-WINE

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

@vicdibitetto upon completion of his tasks, Vic realized it was *his* car.

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

8p Saturday, October 24th @CatchPrinceton 102 Carnegie Center, Princeton NJ * always great, sells fast * more filthy jokes than you can shake your dick at * smooching & sex in the aisles * @Matt_Nappo @MarkSimoneNY @PrincetonFTBL @GoToWhitney @Q1043 https://t.co/DqhgD6zcJ4

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

world's most unique & fun gifts: personalized videos, however you request * make a co-worker laugh on his birthday, creatively flirt, insult a relative because why not? * jokes & cheap shots for all occasions * sweet or foul * & the video is yours forever! https://t.co/eqZDXeNbwk

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

in January 1979, Richie Minervini & I had to promote Long Island's first all-comedy show at Cinnamon in Huntington. we had no money, so I came up with the bright idea to put an ad for our show on a phone answering machine sandwiched between dirty jokes. it's still up & running.

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

try it, you'll like it ..

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

this is a twisted yet classic love song * one listen & it'll get in your head * roll it up, take a few hits, & .. "And I'm Thinkin' About You" @bertkreischer @GoToWhitney @friarsclub @WorldRecordPod @1023WBAB @govscomedy @CruiseShipWars @Q1043 https://t.co/B2c0pSVSiB via @YouTube

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

download 5 hours of non-stop wild & hysterical jokes, only $20! best comedy bargain of this or any century! repeat these incredible jokes! you'll make & lose friends at an alarming rate! these spectacular jokes will change your life, maybe for the better! https://t.co/FnB5zvRjwG

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

@MonstrosityPod with @RealDavidRace, an old friend from the late 80's Stern Show * great memories, lots of laughs * very little nudity, fairly clever, a minimum of singing @Matt_Nappo @TheAftershockXL @GoToWhitney @MarkSimoneNY @SiriusXMComedy @Newsday https://t.co/WrEBYElZhR

[MonstrosityPodcast @MonstrosityPod]

2 former #HowardStern staffers do most incredible #HowardSternShow related interview you'll ever hear, on latest ep of @MonstrosityPod
Jackie "The Joke Man" and David Race, together, here's link:
https://t.co/oXSBW0TtIB

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

worth mentioning: 100% of the folks who go to Jackie's shows get laid that night ..

[Jackie Martling @JackieMartling]

8pm Sat Aug 15th w/ Rich Harkaway @SoulJoels 50 Sunnybrook Rd., Pottstown PA * rainy day, hooker takes out guy's pecker: "It's too big." "That's no reason to drop it in the mud." * lady: "Doc, I've got diarrhea. Can I take a bath?" "If you've got enough."