Jack Schmidt

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

Can we all agree that Twitter did not bring us together..

X did.

[DNI Tulsi Gabbard @DNIGabbard]

Today, I’m releasing never before seen intelligence revealing new evidence of past US government funding for more than 120 biolabs in over 30 countries, including Ukraine.

In support of President Trump‘s Executive Order to end federal funding of dangerous gain of function research around the world, and increase transparency and accountability, ODNI will continue working with partners across the Administration to identify where these labs are, what pathogens they contain, and what “research” is being conducted.

https://t.co/pLMD0krc69

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

The horde is provisioned

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving.

Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free.

I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these."

"They just come with the table, man."

They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner.

This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat.

I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared.

"Did we…?"

"Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless."

Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined.

My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude."

Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man.

I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy.

Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.

I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most.

Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

The horde is PROVISIONED!

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. The hotel bathroom contains a row of tiny bottles, and I must report what they have done to my soul.

Shampoo, the size of my thumb. Conditioner, its twin. A lotion. A wrapped soap like a small gift. And a second, MYSTERIOUS soap — for what? The bottles do not say. The second soap keeps its own counsel, and at this point I protect its privacy.

Each one labeled in elegant tiny print. Each replaced FRESH daily. Each free — in the sense that nothing in this world is free, but these, somehow, morally, are.

Hear my descent, America, for it is every traveler's descent.

Night one: I used the tiny shampoo as intended. Civilized. Unremarkable.

Night two: housekeeping had replaced it — a FULL one, though mine was barely used. Now there were two. An inventory had begun, unbidden.

Night three: I found myself — and I report this as a witness reports a crime — placing the unopened bottles INTO MY LUGGAGE and arranging the used ones forward, like a merchant rotating stock.

My hands did this. Some ancient gathering instinct, dormant through decades of discipline, awakened by bottles the size of acorns.

I confessed at the front desk, because confession is my way and the desk has heard everything.

"I have been... collecting the bathroom bottles."

The clerk did not look up from her screen. "Sir, that's what they're for. Take as many as you want." Then — hear this — she reached beneath the desk and produced MORE BOTTLES. A fistful. Like a grandmother producing candy.

The hoard is not merely tolerated, America. The hoard is PROVISIONED.

In Japan, our ryokan amenities are works of art, and taking them home is expected, and we ALSO pretend we are not doing it, every one of us, at every checkout, forever. Same instinct. Same tiny bottles. Same dignity-preserving silence. Our two nations have never been closer than at this exact shelf.

I asked the clerk why guests love them so much — a few cents of soap, in a country of abundance.

She gave me the answer I have been turning over since:

"I think people just like that it's theirs. Whole bottle, brand new, nobody else's. Like... a little fresh start every day."

A LITTLE FRESH START. NOBODY ELSE'S. The tiny bottle is not shampoo, America. It is a private sunrise in travel size — and the urge to carry several home is the urge to bank sunrises against duller mornings.

A man does not ask the bottles why they are small. He takes the fresh start. Then he takes four more.

My collection now lives in my guest bathroom, deployed in a neat row. My wife calls it "the hotel." Guests light up at it — grown adults, delighted by thumb-sized soap, every single time, without one exception in eight months.

Of course they do. It's a whole bottle. Brand new. Nobody else's.

Take the bottles, friends. The clerk herself has ruled.

The second soap remains unexplained. Do not write to me with the answer. Some mysteries are load-bearing.

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

@juliandorey As long as they aren’t used bringing her back

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

@Jadestormchase Missouri is my neck of the woods 💖

[alexjm 🇺🇸 @alexjmingolla]

Europeans online: “stay away from America, it’s horrible!”

@FreddyLA7 discovering a new state:

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

@FreddyLA7 Find a tailgate party!

[Arthur Boreman (yes, that Arthur Boreman) @ArthurBoreman]

Brits in England: “This is the worst world cup ever!”

Germans driving a Mustang through Georgia with the top down to a game: “🎶AND I’M PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN, WHERE AT LEAST I KNOW I’M FREE!!!🎶”

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

This internet right here is why I am happy to be alive today 🤌💖🙏

[TUPACABRA @tupacabra]

God forbid Bob Lazar starts feeling himself.

[Julian Dorey @juliandorey]

until AIPAC and similar political organizations register under FARA, actions like this are performative

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

@marcuslemonis Flowers?

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

More people understand than those who take offense. We are a large and very mixed back of personalities. Be genuine to yourself and the right people show up and protect your back. Let the shitheads die on the vine with their poor engagement. Keep going. Keep your head up! Don’t let the bad get you down.

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

@learning_yohei Sunglasses = cool points

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

@learning_yohei It’s mostly emotionally expensive. But we have a lot of space here, so we are fine filling it with large impressive items and ideas! Small things might get lost easily!

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

Don’t sweat the mistranslations, some responses may come off as abrupt, but there are more people who like you, than those that don’t. And mean people live little lives. They give us opportunity to rise above. Acknowledge the good, ignore or passively side-eye the shitheads.
Have a lovely day!

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

@E_Kellerstrauss @DecipheringTV @Producer_Meagan @NewsNation Unverified Ernie is BoThErEd

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

@tuuu28283 ‘Hey’, is never rude

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

@Jadestormchase Spectacular!!

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

@kunoichi_jp_ Following for small locals ����🙏

[Jack Schmidt @JacksSchmidt]

@tuuu28283 Yeup