JP

humanity is wild and i have a 𝕐𝕆𝕃𝕆 tattoo

[JP @JamieParx]

Rock bottom or mile high when you discover actual Steve Urkel has blocked you on twitter?

[JP @JamieParx]

tomorrow we let the entire queer community decide if we are allowed to return to our headband girlie era. gonna be tragic either way

[JP @JamieParx]

@kourtneyinhell Nah pls don’t stop

[JP @JamieParx]

I want it on record that i sincerely believe Andy Reid is a stone-cold killer when it comes to eating box

[JP @JamieParx]

@megladdd I am so happy and jealous of both yours and the spare rib’s experience tonight 💦

[JP @JamieParx]

@lahansen12 @SteveSkojec Source?

[JP @JamieParx]

Incredible night out for the other diners. They got a cute lil testosterone show and a perfect excuse to walk out on a meal before the check came 🤟

[Spittin' Chiclets @spittinchiclets]

FOOTAGE HAS BEEN RELEASED OF THE SCUMBAGS WHO TRIED JUMPING @BizNasty2point0 AT HOUSTON’S RESTAURANT

[JP @JamieParx]

When the front desk girl at the walk-in 24-hour spa asks, “Are you okay with a male masseuse? Ours are very good and fun”. See you all on the other side

[JP @JamieParx]

Still trying to figure out why white claw made a non alcoholic version. I get the sentiment but isn’t that..literally..just.. a..seltzer ???

[JP @JamieParx]

Suddenly have a cosmic urge to buy nunchucks

[JP @JamieParx]

Legendary day in Times Square today; there’s a massive hotdog shooting out confetti and also a hop-on-hop-off bus just classically drove through a puddle and splashed some females. Splendid Tuesday

[JP @JamieParx]

@theballisorange You’re always the best hype man

[JP @JamieParx]

Sorry i haven’t been consistently tweeting in months, I’ve been getting fingered

[JP @JamieParx]

@megladdd I hope it was so fucking awesome

[JP @JamieParx]

earth is hands down the most narcissistic planet in the universe

[JP @JamieParx]

There’s absolutely nothing more sim than watching the solar eclipse with the naked cowboy in the heart of Times Square 💅

[JP @JamieParx]

✨flips lap top open til Friday ✨

[big content guy @bigcontentguy]

i know Caitlin Clark got a boyfriend but i just know she could whip the hell out of a Subaru Outback

[JP @JamieParx]

Sorry i can’t make it to that dinner tonight i have to go home and sit on my couch and try out this new ear wax removal device that i just got by scamming a bodega cashier into letting me have it for $6.99 💅

[JP @JamieParx]

@k_ourtney Royalty and loyalty, baby