Horrified Onlooker!

Do not pet the fluffy murder cow.

[Mike Bales 🫡🇺🇸 @MikeBales]

Necco Wafers: the candy equivalent of getting socks for Christmas. Tastes like regret wrapped in pastel chalk. Quite possibly the worst definition of ‘candy’ ever invented. Change my mind.

[Adrienne @YoAdrienne1968]

During our country’s Bicentennial Celebration, Jimmy Carter was President. I don’t remember my Republican parents sitting home and crying because their guy wasn’t in the Oval Office. 🤔

[Horrified Onlooker! @Jefiner1]

@Grey_0G Heal quickly and feel better!

[Horrified Onlooker! @Jefiner1]

@sarahadams @Salted2 Good move. Ryan really has gone off the rails.

[Horrified Onlooker! @Jefiner1]

@atrupar Shut the fuck up, and keep your politics to yourself. If I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.

[Horrified Onlooker! @Jefiner1]

@Acosta You still here flapping your gums?

[Horrified Onlooker! @Jefiner1]

@Woohoo22923805 @chefjoseandres Andres is a raging communist. Of course he is down with that.

[Horrified Onlooker! @Jefiner1]

@chefjoseandres But you are on stolen land, hypocrite.

[Horrified Onlooker! @Jefiner1]

@adammocklerr Nice delusion, bro.

[Horrified Onlooker! @Jefiner1]

@ImposeCost @TaskandPurpose vomelet 😆

[Horrified Onlooker! @Jefiner1]

@NickKristof Lies, damn lies and goddamn lies.

[Meghan McCain @MeghanMcCain]

“America deserved 9/11” is a hell of a platform for democrats to be embracing.

[𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 @OrevaZSN]

The extinction of the dinosaurs is technically the highest ratio of birds killed with one stone.

[Roman Helmet Guy @romanhelmetguy]

If you were born in America, you’re an American. You have a right to live here. Unless of course you’re American. In which case you’re living on stolen land.

[Horrified Onlooker! @Jefiner1]

@LangmanVince zip, zilch, nada.

[Horrified Onlooker! @Jefiner1]

@SenWhitehouse Go suck Monica Lewinsky's cigar.

[Kasey Quanrud @digitalspaz]

I dream to see certain things in my lifetime, even though they’re unlikely

[Horrified Onlooker! @Jefiner1]

@BladeoftheS utter horseshit. Do better, snowflake.

[Hazel Appleyard @HazelAppleyard]

When autistic kids spot patterns, they’re considered savant geniuses.

But when I do it I’m considered a racist, Islamophobic, antisemitic bigot. 🤦🏻‍♀️

[Hy Bender @hybender]

Coolest use of a drone